My mum arrived last night to help with my son.

Bit of background.

She is a midwife, has been for around 40 years. Hospital based for the last 20 years.

Originally due to the lack of choices within the hospital system and the OB's instantly putting me into the "high risk" category and insisting induction at 38 weeks - I asked my mother how she would feel helping me with a Home Birth (I couldn't find a private midwife in our area)

She was all for it, had done private midwifery in her career and we went about planning the birth.

Alarm bells started to ring in my head when she started saying things like "I will be keeping a close eye on you, if something doesn't look the slightest bit right we will transfer" and things like "you can labour in any position you like, but as soon as the delivery is imminent then you need to be on your back" blah blah blah blah......

I spoke privately with my DH (who pretty much lets me make the decisions re: my body and birth) and he agreed that this would be too tense for any of us to enjoy the day and felt as though my mother would be a control freak etc.

So I took my chances and got in touch with the local birth centre who I never in a million years thought they'd take me on (due to the "high risk" thing) and they did! It's even backed by their OB. They even gave me the option to still HB.

Anyway, I was stoked - I could still get my non-intervention birth with midwives that were prepared to let me do what I wanted in my birth plan. I am choosing a douche for GBS rather than IV anti-biotics, water birth etc. Brilliant - I was starting to look forward to the birth.

Then my mother comes home last night. Hasn't seen me in 4 months - first statement was "oh my god look at your big belly" ok then - I am 9 months pregnant......then she feels my belly and says "are you sure you're right with your dates" yes I had a dating scan at 6 weeks and I am very confident.....why? "because this baby is going to be a LOT bigger than Cooper......you might want a sizing scan just to be sure"......

Already my hormonal rage began building and she had been standing in my house less than 10 minutes.

She then asks how they are going to manage the GBS. I told her I am refusing the AB and opting for the douche......her reply "arrgh".....need she say more? I just shot her a look and said "this is MY INFORMED DECISION" to which she noted the anger and said "yes well this is your birth but I have seen babies get very sick" BLAH BLAH BLAH - I again told her that I had made my choice and weighed the pros and cons etc.

I think she has a bee in her bonnet about me telling her that I wanted a Birth Centre/IM HB rather than her deliver her grandchild.

She let an hour or so go by and said "I've brought everything in case your labour is so quick you deliver at home".......I told her my midwife lives 20 minutes away and we've already discussed this. If I can't get to the BC in time, she'll head over for the HB.

Then this morning first conversations are about all the new things my toddler is doing, then she says "are you feeling uncomfortable?" I say "yeah, kidlet doesn't have much more room but not long anyway I can handle it" she says "all you need are your waters broken and you'll be on your way" I say "what are you suggesting?" yep you guessed it, she offered to break my waters.

THEN she proceeds to say "if you don't want to do that, you could try expressing some milk daily, that may start things"

At this point I've had enough. I look at her and say "enough already. Stop being so bloody selfish about MY pregnancy and wanting to do what you want to do - which part of I AM HAPPY TO GO TO 10 DAYS OVER DON'T YOU GET?"

Her response "your placenta fails in it's function after 40 weeks and you are prepared to go 1 week and 3 days past this"?

I've told her to get in the car and go for a drive because if she stayed in front of me for one more minute I was going to regret the next thing that comes out of my mouth......so she's gone for a drive and I've just gotten off the phone to my poor DH who is just trying to get some work done.

Needed to vent - but bloody hell - how hard is it for people just to leave me alone and let me be? I am not by any means a stupid person and have made informed decisions along the way. These 2 kids I have been blessed with came with years of infertility and a few losses, so I would think that anyone should know that I wouldn't just take risks with my birth.



GRRRRRRRR