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Thread: OK, I want the truth!

  1. #37


    Maybe you could direct the said midwife to read this thread It sound like she needs some feedback. Generalisations like hers are neiter true or helpful. Sure you may vomit, or you may not. You may tear but you may not either...especially with good preparation and uncoached second stage in an optimum position. Rosehip oil for the peri massage by the way is brilliant!!

  2. #38

    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Getting to know Brisbane all over again


    Sasha - I don't know why anyone would say that everybody does a certain thing in labour as everyones labour is so different. I felt very nausous during trasition, not like all the time but just waves but never actually threw up ( which was amazing as I still had ms at the time so it wouldn't have taken much to make me vomit) As for tearing there are loads of women on here that have given birth without tearing and you're right the midwives should be working with you to help the peri stretch as you birth your baby. Have you read active birth they have heaps of suggestions to help with slowing down the birth to allow the peri to stretch. Hope you get a more pos response from your next class

  3. #39

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Newcastle, NSW


    I vomited during labour with all my babies (with James, it was because of the gas!)... and had an Epi for James... and I have never torn... With Madeleine, I didn't have a graze or anything.

  4. #40
    mel-lou Guest


    Hi - I had no drugs during labout, but during transition there was one stage where I felt like I was going to vomit, but I didn't. The midwife told me that nausea and vomiting was a normal part of labour which I hadn't realised before then. I tore but it wasn't big and I never felt it happen, never felt it being stitched up or while it was healing. Mind you I had some other postnatal complicatons down there so it probalby disguised the pain of the tear!

  5. #41
    paradise lost Guest


    I didn't vomit, i didn't even feel sick!

    My labour was so fast, i only know which bit was transition in retrospect (at the time my midwife had just left after telling me i was 3cm), and i see now that when i was in the bath, after my 1st internal, and suddenly started telling DP "I need to go to hospital, i HAVE to push, i need an epidural!" (we were having a homebirth, the midwife thought DD was a bit posterior, giving me premature pushing urge, turns out i just went from 3cm-10cm in about 90 minutes). Aside from that fear i woudln't have noticed transition.

    I tore a tiny bit. DD came out very fast (ears to toes in my one and only push, having spent hours not pushing and roaring to avoid the urge) and her shoulders were a tiny bit too big for me to stretch round. It was a 1st degree which i declined to have stitched. It healed up very fast and aside from the usual slightly fleshier appearance all my mother friends have reported, it has all gone back exactly the way it was before (NB - the difference "down there" is something i can see but which DP (before we split, at which point she was only 8 weeks old) said both looked and felt the same). I was flat on my back, i'd laid down to be examined, not to give birth! I'm sure if i'd been on my knees i'd have been fine.

    Women who have 3rd and 4th degree tears usually have medically augmented birth (thus birthing before their body is opened up enough) or have forceps or ventouse or some other giant medical implement put up there. Also not having an epidural can really help since with full sensation the baby's head causes a stinging numbness which makes it bearable but stops you doing yourself injury. The thing about vaginas is, they s-t-r-e-t-c-h. All they need is time and relaxation. You do have to relax relax relax to open up properly, and take your time - it stings at crowning but it's so worth panting and giving yourself a little time, the baby will be just fine, to stretch properly. Engorgement helps us to stretch, placing warm washcloths against the perineum during crowning and oiling the whole area can help increase blood supply and aid relaxation of the area.

    There's a massive fuss about vaginas stretching or not stretching or tearing etc. Penis's grow and shrink hugely in all directions several times a day and we don't even THINK about it. Your body and its tissues can cope with birth. Have faith.

    As a side note, i was really quite worried about tearing before i had my baby. Once i'd had her, and tore, i realised how much of a big deal is isn't. I felt like i'd been kicked in the perineum, but my friend (who didn't tear) said she felt exactly the same, it's just the general bruising of the area from the pressure.

    Birth is a small, everyday, commonplace miracle. Enjoy it.



    PS - you're midwife sounds VERY realistic, maybe she's aiming at stopping people having unrealistic ideals, but she could have been gentler!

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