Weighing up the pros and cons

[{sarah}]

How are things going Miss Debbie?? Enjoying the books I hope?

[Debbie Lee]

Hey Sarah...
Yep... am halfway through one of them - "Thinking Woman's Guide"... and I'm enjoying it so far. Very eye-opening!

[{sarah}]

Yaaaay!!

[Debbie Lee]

I had a lovely midwife (Cath) from Warrnambool call me yesterday (thanks to Kelly ). I'd been meaning to call her but she chased me instead! Gotta love that! She was so easy to talk to! I'm considering having the baby in Warrnambool now after she talked some sense into me (I was worried about the fact that the hospital is an hour away and we've got very little support network here to look after Gab). I am also concerned because I want to stay at home as long as possible before going to the hospital to stave off intervention etc. So... she suggested what someone else from this area did. They headed to Warrnambool in early labour and hired a motel room. She then laboured there until she was ready to go to the hospital. That's a very good option. Obviously I'd prefer to be at home but if I can get a better VBAC chance at Warrnambool then perhaps it's worth the compromise?
She also listened to my issues regarding what to do with Gabby. We do have a couple of friends here (that have offered to look after Gabby when the time comes) but they'll have a 4 month old baby by then and I didn't want to impose. However... it was pointed out to me... why would they offer if they didn't genuinely mean it?? Too true. Perhaps I will use their help when the time comes. Leave Gabby with them until Mum can get here to look after her. It'll only take my Mum 2.5 hours to get here so it's not like Gabby will be with them for a long period of time AND she does know them (they have a 2yo that she likes to play with) so she'll be ok. I'm a bit scared about being an hour away from her but once Mum gets here I won't be as worried.

I'm still going to see the midwives at Hamilton Hospital armed with a question that Cath suggested I ask - will they let me go overdue? If they can't answer straight away or say "no" then it's a high indication that they'll be pushing for intervention that I don't want (for no good reason). Apparently I can be booked into 2 hospitals so it's worth me looking into Warrnambool as an option. I need to get a referral from my doctor to see the doctors in Warrnambool so that'll tell them that I'm serious about trying for a VBAC. Time will tell I guess!

Cath also said that if I do have the baby at Warrnambool that she'd be happy to come in for my birth if she wasn't working at the time! How nice is that! She hasn't even met me yet! Yet I felt so reassured just talking to her. She's doing a home birth in Hamilton so she suggest we meet for a cuppa next time she's down for her weekly appointments. I'll definitely take her up on that.

I'm thinking about joining the ABA too and going to a couple of meetings. Might help me meet some people and also with BFing after I have Little Bee.

[{sarah}]

YAYAYAY Deb, sounds like you've found a fantastic midwife Just what you needed!! And as for Gab, that's great news that someone has offered to look after her while your mum gets there. You never know it might be in the middle of the night & she'll barely notice

[Fi]

Deb - I didn't do the stay at home as long as you can thing, and it worked for me. Why can't you go to hossy when you think its the right time, and bugger them if they try to send you home
Labouring in the birthing unit at Geelong was fine. By the end of the 2 days I spent in there (most of my labour plus a day afterwards) I felt very comfortable in there

[Debbie Lee]

Hehehe yeah more than likely, Sarah. Tho if it's the middle of the night we'd have to wake her up and take her to their house.... although maybe one of them could come here until she wakes up in the morning? I guess that's what we'll have to discuss. Gab's pretty good. She'll probably just go back to sleep once we get to their house.

Fi - I want to stay at home because I reckon I'll be more relaxed and labour better at home. I also worry about intervention-happy doctors trying to do things to speed labour up if it's not going fast enough for their liking (as they do). So I'd rather stay away from the hospital iykwim?

[christy]

YAY Deb that all sounds so promising! We had serious issues with finding people to look after Matilda and then something hit me. I would offer to look after an older child & I would leave my 2 with Pete and go myself. To me it would be an honour to look after the older child so the mum can labour in peace.... well ykwim. I think a clear head about your first baby is so important for labour. So if you would love to look after a child for labour, then you think they might like to have that honour as well

Labouring at home. Whatever works best for you. I went to hospital earlier than I planned but mainly because I needed to get out of the house... no rational explanation other than I needed to make noise & didn't want to wake up Matilda.

[Fi]

Deb - with a toddler around, and the people to look after her there too, you might find that hossy is actually more relaxing!! I know I did. Shane and I got our 3rd dinner by ourselves in 20m and no Jenna demanding to be picked up was good too.
Don't sell yourself short, the hossy might not be the slightest bit interested in intervention!

[Debbie Lee]

Yeah... I guess I'll get a feel for it before I decide on what we do. Either way, it'll be good to have a motel room if we got to Warrnambool so that Neil has somewhere to go and not have to drive an hour to get home... at least for the first night/day (whenever it happens to be!! LOL).

[BellyBelly]

Wow Deb, what can I say... it's been incredible reading your journey and I think this birth is going to be very healing for you, no matter what happens - you have so many people wanting to support you and you are supporting yourself too. It's just fantastic to hear. Well done hon, I think you are going to have an amazing experience and I can't wait to hear - no matter what path your journey is going to take, we're all sitting here cheering for you and proud that you've been so pro-active. It's alot of work isn't it?! But you are doing it. You'll be so glad.

[{sarah}]

Here here Kelly

[Debbie Lee]

Awww thanks Kelly
I do feel like I'm going to go into this with my eyes wide open... a far cry from when I went in with Gabby. I'm starting to look at my experience with having Gab as a learning experience rather than a "failure" iykwim? I think that's a good thing
I'm just so glad i have this place to gain perspective (and get different perspective iykwim?). It helps to challenge some of the negative thoughts I have floating around my head constantly! LOL

Ooo ooo and Kirsty (mod Kirsty) has had experience with the system in Warrnambool so she's gonna be a great help Always nice to know of someone that has been through the system.