I don't think people's *own* views or *own* standards are a judgement call So what if I hold my experiences to a standard others don't...who the heck am I to have other people want to measure up to what *I* think is normal, natural, red, boring etc. Not every positive opinion on natural birth is a judgement against those who didn't have one. Just as I hold myself to my own standards as a mother, a wife, a member of society. Some have higher expectations of themselves, some have lower. Doesn't male anyone better or worse, just different in their perceptions. For example, some people like internals and don't see them as harmful. I see them as a potential problem, in the way that a woman may hear she is 'only' 3cms and feel incredibly disheartened at that...and up go the mental blocks and barriers. Psychological impacts on labour can be just as jarring as physical ones.
As for optimal...I agree and I disagree. I transferred to hospital because DD's water was mec stained. So an optimal decision for her health, but I'm still allowed to feel and express a small sense of regret in not achieving my homebirth. To say that we should only focus on a healthy outcome takes away the emotional outcome of the mother, and the ramifications that holds. I'm not saying that is more important than the babies health, but it is valid and shouldn't be dismissed. An incredibly traumatic birth that results optimally (so an alive baby and mum?) I think is actually a really low standard and is unfortunately one that our medical system adopts regularly. And often unnecessarily. Which is why I think it's important to make our own calls as to what we hold as our 'golden' standard, and to strive for that.
And as always, that's just how *I* feel...I don't expect others to agree, and that's cool
Last edited by PumpkinZulu; December 2nd, 2011 at 06:23 AM.
So what if I hold my experiences to a standard others don't...who the heck am I to have other people want to measure up to what *I* think is normal, natural, red, boring etc. Not every positive opinion on natural birth is a judgement against those who didn't have one. Just as I hold myself to my own standards as a mother, a wife, a member of society. Some have higher expectations of themselves, some have lower. Doesn't male anyone better or worse, just different in their perceptions. For example, some people like internals and don't see them as harmful. I see them as a potential problem, in the way that a woman may hear she is 'only' 3cms and feel incredibly disheartened at that...and up go the mental blocks and barriers. Psychological impacts on labour can be just as jarring as physical ones.
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