So an optimal decision for her health, but I'm still allowed to feel and express a small sense of regret in not achieving my homebirth. To say that we should only focus on a healthy outcome takes away the emotional outcome of the mother, and the ramifications that holds. I'm not saying that is more important than the babies health, but it is valid and shouldn't be dismissed.
I never touched on the topic of whether or not people can feel regret for not achieving what they consider to be natural/normal. I was only talking about the label / classification people want to give a particular birth. I didn't dismiss the emotional outcome of the mother. Quite obviously, a traumatic birth that resulting in a healthy mother/baby is not nice to experience and quite often is not the optimal that could have been achieved. The emotional health of the mother and her birthing desires should form part of what is considered optimal.

What I am saying is that we should focus on the best possible birth given the circumstance. If it is not possible for a particular mother/baby to achieve a drug free intervention free monitoring free vaginal birth... then that is not her golden standard, that is not her goal.

Unfortunately, for some women, an unnatural birth might be the best standard achievable. A vaginal birth for a woman placenta previa might result in a suboptimal outcome than a cs, for example.

I see a lot of people talk about the ideal natural birth, and feel awful if their own birth doesn't measure up to THAT standard. I can understand why they do it but I refuse. My golden standard is not a perfect natural unassisted unmedicated birth. My gold standard is the most natural, minimal interventionist birth possible for me and my baby and I outright refuse to feel any guilt because of the difference between my gold standard and the perfect natural unassisted unmedicated birth.

My opinion, of course .