Thanks for sharing Seph! I read this the day you posted but I wasn't able to reply at the time cause it just seemed so raw and close to the bone IYKWIM. I really thank you for your honesty about each step, your thoughts and reactions has actually helped me with my preparations for birth and I used your experience to talk some things through with my midwife that I hadn't faced until now.

DH, my Doula and I have debriefed and processed everything from that day, and I am 100% reconciled to the events that took place, although we’re all traumatised regardless. DH and I always said that if we were going to accept medical interventions, it needed to be for medical reasons. I am lucky that I was able to deliver him vaginally and not have a c-section, although the third-degree tearing has left me feeling a little fragile, both emotionally and physically.
I think you are amazing to understand what is going on and be reconciled but acknowledge you are traumatised is so going to help in the long run.

Well done mummy for doing such a great job in bringing Archie into this world - a much wanted and loved baby he is
xx