What's wrong with me?

[jellybean88]

Does anyone here not enjoy breastfeeding or is there something wrong with me?

I fed ds EBM for the first 4 days and then completely formula fed for reasons put of my control but still felt guilty for over a year about it so was keen to feed dd when I found out I was pg with her now she is here I'm not enjoying it and makes me feel blah I don't have any issues with breastfeeding or think its icky or anything , things touching my nipples have always made me feel yuk emotionally and physically and it feels the same when I bf I don't mind it but I do find I feel a bit oh no not again sort of thing BUT in saying all this I don't seem to be able to stop bf because I just can't let go and don't want to feel guilty again even though my ds is completely happy healthy little boy , do you think it's because we're always told breast is best (and I'm not wanting any arguments) and we feel that anything else makes us bad parents? Since ff ds I don't care which way a person feeds their child and dont completely agree woth that statement as long as there cared for and looked after and loved but maybe I still hang onto that
Also I have no other feeding issues I have good supply and no pain or anything which also kinda makes me feel bad cause I wish I could give it to someone else who is working so hard to bf through issues and here I am not liking it and its cone so easy to me

Edit: Dd is 7 weeks