Would you let someone else breastfeed your bub?

[HotI]

Would / have you let someone else breastfeed your bub? Or have you breastfeed a friend/relative s baby?

I am trying to work out how i feel about this. I have spoken to some older women who were breastfeeding in the 70s who would feed other mum's (close friends) kids when babysitting and the baby needed a feed.

I am not immediately comfortable with the idea, but it also doesn't freak me out.

Would it make a difference if it was your sister vs a friend or sister in law (non relation)?

Would it make a difference if it was another woman s breastmilk, but given via cup or bottle rather than from the breast?

[Traveller]

Yes I would. However this is only after boytwin was very ill as a newborn and taken to a hospital where I could not visit often. He was all alone and as much as I tried to express I didn't have enough so he was topped up. He needed skin to skin and I really wish I had asked a friend (who lived nearby and was lactating) to feed him for me but I didn't consider it until later. So anyway that changed my whole attitude towards others feeding my children, but in a social setting I don't see that I would ever need to ask someone else to feed my child.

This is all hypothetical for me anyway, all my bubs are weaned now :-(

[Jennie13]

OMG I have never even thort of that before...do people do it??

How would you make milk if you didnt just have a bub?

[LimeSlice]

Yes I would. I have no problem with it at all really - so long as the other person is clean and sober and my child was comfortable with it.
I think initially I would have irrational fears that my baby would like the other milk better or something, but when it came to it, if baby needs food and I am not there or not able to provide it, then I would appreciate someone else offering that nourishment rather than having to turn to artificial methods.

[Phteven]

If I couldn't BF I would prefer my baby to be fed with human milk than formula especially if I had a baby who was premmie or sick. I used to think that I wouldn't be ok with another woman breastfeeding my baby but I've loosened up a bit now and I figure that if another woman was generous enough to give her breastmilk to my baby I wouldn't care how she delivered it. Then again I would probably be uncomfortable with a stranger feeding from the breast even if she had been screened but if it was a friend or family member I wouldn't mind.

[HotI]

OMG I have never even thort of that before...do people do it??

How would you make milk if you didnt just have a bub?

Sorry, i should have explained- I meant if the other woman also had a bub of similar age. I don't think you could just 'turn it on' for babysitting duties!

[Rivlas]

It used to be quiet common in the 'old days' to use a wet maid. I think it goes to show how much breast milk can help babies.

Never really given the subject much thought to be honest

[chrysalis]

I am not sure about how I feel about actual BF (not thought of it enough really to form a view) but have absolutely no reservations about my bub receiving donor milk by bottle or cup if it were available.

[Nelle]

I think, if my bub needed someone else's milk, I'd prefer them to express. I think I'd feel jealous of the bond, I want to be the only one to snuggle my baby to my chest and stroke their soft cheek while they fed.

As a short term emergency solution I think I'd be okay with it. As a long term, bub cries for food, which means he daily asks for another woman and doesn't really practically 'need' me...I don't think I could do that.

At any rate, that's just me, very influenced by our current culture. And who knows, these are just my initial thoughts, I'll probably have found a whole new way of seeing this issue by next week.

[The[cookie]Doctor]

I am all for baby having another woman's breastmilk but feeding from the breast itself i think would be really strange. TBH for me it was a lot about the bonding and i wouldnt want my child to share that with someone else (despite how different it would be to them) and i wouldnt want to share it with another child. ITMS.

eta *snap* nelle

[beckoes]

I wouldnt mind DD having doner milk if i couldnt BF. As for being fed by someone else, i dont know, id like to say i wouldnt mind but something about it makes me feel uncomfortable.

[Jennie13]

This really got me thinking so I had to ring my my and ask, and she said about about the "wet maids" too

Interesting to think about. I guess if it was a close friend or family member it would be okay...what ever needs to be done to feed the baby

[Jennie13]

*my mum

[*Beema*]

I wouldn't be happy if someone else BF'd my child, and I don't think I could BF someone elses child.

I find it a very personal relationship and bonding, it is so much more then just receiving the milk. I would be ok with skin to skin cuddles, IF my baby was in NICU and either DH or myself were unable to go in for a period of time (ie due to illness), but I would be specific as to who I would be comfortable to have doing it.

I would also be ok, if bub received EBM donated (from a source I wholy trusted) or through a Milk Bank (which i think is pasturised), especially if bub was a prem and I had supply issues (which I did with DD) as BM is so much more beneficial for Prem babies, much gentler on their undeveloped tummies.

Wet nurses are still around, in South Africa, SIL friend had a baby earlier in the year and went back to SA after the birth and she had a wet nurse there for her little girl.

[Schmickers]

I don't think I'd be 100% comfortable with it, but I'd still prefer it to being fed formula if it were an option.

Interestingly, when DW was very sick after the birth of DD#2, we had a similar situation where her milk supply was becoming quite difficult to maintain. A very special friend who had an 18 month old that was still feeding expressed for us so we could top up DD#2 with breast milk other than formula. I had no problem with that.

[Janie]

I think I feel very similarly to Nelle about this. As a short term, or emergency solution, absolutely no drama. I think I would have more of an issue with it long term though. I wouldn't judge anyone else who did though, as I think it's important for all babies to experience feeding at the breast.

As for my babies receiving another mother's BM, well that's a no-brainer..........DS2 has already received breastmilk from three other mothers apart from me

ETA I just wanted to add something........if something were to, um, happen to me that I was no longer around, I would love for my DS to be BF by a friend or relative, even if only sometimes. I would feel awful for him that he had lost BFing so suddenly, and would really appreciate someone else having that closeness with him. I feel quite sick writing, and even thinking about that, but I just thought I should add it in.

[allycat06]

Most definitely...we drink milk from any old cow so I don't see how it should be any different for babies. It'd have to be somebody I knew well and trusted, I don't think it would ruin the bond I had with my child in the slightest. Much rather breastmilk from another woman than formula. I'd do it for a friend or family member for sure.

I read an article once about a man in some small country town in America whose wife died in childbirth...all the lactating women in the town rallied round, organised a roster and would come and feed his newborn each day and then express for him to feed bub in the evenings. What a lovely thing to do!

[Glamourcide]

I'd be totally cool with BM delivered via bottle/sippy cup, providing it was either through a legit milk bank (ie stranger who had been through screening process) or a very close friend or relative. Not sure how I'd feel about actually putting my baby to another woman's breast, I guess I'm a bit of a jealous Nelly when it comes to others doing 'mummy' things with my kids, kwim? That's not restricted to BFing either so I don't think it's just that I'm squeamish about that.