babe, I know the feeling.
I'm no expert and I can only go on my personal experience with Nate, but he was just like that. I felt like I might as well wear no shirt...it was just a hindrance. I was so desperate I even tried EBM to get a break...only he refused that.
He still eats very little and still, frustratingly, spits lots of stuff out. But, that said he'll have a go. And gradually over time he is improving. He still had 3 night feeds at least until about 15-16months (not trying to scare you, just show you that some babies do). And like you said they were really good feeds. Sometimes even now I know he's starving in the middle of the night, but he gets (embarrassed here) a piece of dry bread, and we sit and eat it in bed in the dark, just like the feeds.