Nevsta, please hang around in here and read up - there is stacks of information here and on the main site.

There are many many ways to 'control' your labour and that's through knowledge. As much as it is affecting you that your friends have some issues now, remember there are millions of women that DON'T have pelvic floor problems delivering vaginally...like moi!
I gave birth to all my bubs upright, one in the water - they were a range of sizes and I didn't even tear once. Even just positioning yourself in labour can make a WORLD of difference.

Ask as many questions as you like, and check out the relevant threads - its amazing what you can learn in here!