Do they know what the estimated likelihood is of pelvic damage if you have a VB Ali? And is it viable to have a trial of labour with option for c/s if things look like they might be going pearshaped?

FWIW, not all CS take a full 6 weeks to recover from. I was driving with Dr permission at 3 weeks post-op, and functioning pretty normally by then, and I had an emergency c/s after long labour and three hours of pushing and with haemorrhaging and mild infection. As well as a slower than 'average' recovery because I can't take anti-inflammatory drugs.

Depending on the risk of pelvic damage and of the support you have available, given the extensiveness of the recovery if you do require reconstruction, I would probably choose a c/s as the recovery is less likely to be as severe. But given that your Ob is not rushing in with scalpel blazing (which is unusual), then it suggests that the risk of pelvic damage is indeed quite low. Does your Ob have a good understanding of the circumstances you are in and of the level of support you can expect?