Nyrad
I'm so glad I read your post. We have had a similar journey. After 10 years and losing 6 babies I couldn't face anymore IVF/ICSI...so I gave up...finally accepted it wasn't to be...packed up and moved to the country...and then 6 months later we fell pregnant naturally. It has been a wonderful surprise but I have been struggling with anxiety and worry. I too am considering an elective C/S purely based on my current anxiety issues...I am more scared of labour and me having a panic attack and harming our baby. My Ob and GP have both been so supportive and not asking me to make any decisions right now but have both assured me that if that's the way we decide to go they understand. Just having the option has been a huge weight off my shoulders. I never thought I'd actually write this all down through fear of people judging me but our journey has been tough...and seeing Dh's face as they had him say goodbye to me as they rushed me off to surgery with a ruptured ectopic .. litres of blood already in my tummy ...was the scariest experience of my life...I don't think he or I can cope with something like that again. Thanks for listening