Sleep Issues.

[ladybirdflies]

What are the hours before bed like for him? Say between 4 and bedtime... what does he eat, what games does he play, what time does he go to bed??

You can PM the reply if you like. I work with children and families with sleep challenges... happy to share a few tips.

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

Dinner time conversation. Let him say everything before bedtime. I find this really helpful to stop the bedtime "oh, and another thing..." sort of conversations.

I don't know if you have any faith or not, but "talking to God" helps us. So Liebs says prayers before bed, and when I go, he can talk to God. OK, it means that sometimes he's up past my bedtime, but it means that usually he goes to sleep.

He also has the coolest bed in the house, so doesn't want to sleep in mine any more. Before he got that bed, he'd be in our bed as often as he could be.

[Cass72]

This won't help at all but....

I am firmly of the opinion that some people's sleep patterns are just plain weird (aka not normal and totally off balance) and there is nothing we can do to change them. I have tried daytime sleeps, no daytime sleeps, earlier bedtime, later bedtime, midnight snacks, singing, elimination diet, reading stories, gro-clock, shut door, open door, lights on, lights off, extra food before bed, no food before bed, hot bath before bed, relaxing music, tv, no tv, laying next to him in his bed, letting him sleep in my bed, threatening mum, understanding mum, angry mum, sad mum, sleep-deprived slightly hysterical mum..... the list goes on.

My sweet, wonderful, amazing little person will sleep when he's tired and not at any other time. FWIW his father is exactly the same - something he should have mentioned before we had a child!!

Good luck hun. Just know that you are not alone (although sometimes it feels like it) and you will get through this.

[onthefly]

Sounds like you've already tried a lot of stuff!
Have you looked at diet at all? Sometimes kids have sensitivities and they just get *wired* so they can't sleep. Screen time in the afternoon/evening can also have this effect.

I think it's great that you're doing what you can to make him feel safe and secure. It obviously helps him to be with you.

[wysiwyg]

I like Cass72 think some peoples sleep patterns are just different.

I haven't had a really bad sleeper but I have used "Christiane kerr bedtime meditations" which are bedtime meditations for kids and they are nice to listen to and seem to help them relax. Sometimes if DD happens to wake overnight after a bad dream, she likes this back on to go back to sleep as well.

Have you tried stories on an MP3 player? My reasoning is - can do this in the dark so that helps encourage sleep, and they can't keep asking an MP3 player questions like they can a human reading to them.

[BlackCat]

ladybirdflies - his routine is usually pretty consistent. It may change here or there to accomodate afternoon acitivities such as swimming or playcentre meet up with friends. But no matter what the routine it always ends the same. Bed time fight. He comes home from school and has a snack and homework. Then free play (he can watch some TV in this time), play varies from a game of soccer together, to a chat at the fence with his friend, to jumping on the tramp. We then have quiet time before dinner starting to wind things down, dinner and a chat, before bath/shower, and more quiet time concluding with reading while in bed. Then lights out and the fun really begins.

The Flying Butter - He does talk to God some nights. I think my issue is that he will stay up really late, gets up early in the morning and then its horrible with his behaviour etc because he isn't getting enough sleep. He can't sleep in any later and refuses to go to sleep any earlier. So I guess its a two fold battle I'm facing, 1. How to get him to stay in bed and 2. How to get him to sleep.

Cass72

I have tried daytime sleeps, no daytime sleeps, earlier bedtime, later bedtime, midnight snacks, singing, elimination diet, reading stories, gro-clock, shut door, open door, lights on, lights off, extra food before bed, no food before bed, hot bath before bed, relaxing music, tv, no tv, laying next to him in his bed, letting him sleep in my bed, threatening mum, understanding mum, angry mum, sad mum, sleep-deprived slightly hysterical mum..... the list goes on.

I'm sorry but this made me laugh, particularly the sleep-deprived slightly hysterical mum part. I've done this more that I like to admit I'm glad Im not alone but sorry your facing this battle too.

onthefly - yup tried limiting screen time but I could try limiting it more. Haven't looked into food, it wouldn't be followed through at his Daddy's house either, its hard enough trying to get him to comply to the allergy/intolerance list.

Wysiwyg - We've tried both stories and music on a CD player (its what we had) and that resulted in requests to have it changed once it ran out. Over and over and over. I might look into the bedtime meditations and give them a go, at this point it couldn't hurt right?

I just want my nice happy boy, he is like two different kids, when he has had enough sleep he is wonderful to be around. When he hasn't, well...