This won't help at all but....

I am firmly of the opinion that some people's sleep patterns are just plain weird (aka not normal and totally off balance) and there is nothing we can do to change them. I have tried daytime sleeps, no daytime sleeps, earlier bedtime, later bedtime, midnight snacks, singing, elimination diet, reading stories, gro-clock, shut door, open door, lights on, lights off, extra food before bed, no food before bed, hot bath before bed, relaxing music, tv, no tv, laying next to him in his bed, letting him sleep in my bed, threatening mum, understanding mum, angry mum, sad mum, sleep-deprived slightly hysterical mum..... the list goes on.

My sweet, wonderful, amazing little person will sleep when he's tired and not at any other time. FWIW his father is exactly the same - something he should have mentioned before we had a child!!

Good luck hun. Just know that you are not alone (although sometimes it feels like it) and you will get through this.