Is this normal or should I be complaining?

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

DS's nursery.

I told them before I left work (in 2006) that my baby would need a place in February/March 2008.

I called them December 2007 to see what was going on. They could only offer one day a week, not three as I needed, but that "may change".

I call them February 2008 because DS is clingy and I want him settled. They had "forgotten" about him (I told them he was clingy before Christmas). So we have 2 weeks to acclimatise him. The Friday before I start work on the Monday they tell me that he hasn't had lunch there (they set up the times of visits) so he can't go in. I have to pick him up after lunch and they won't have him any more. I tell them not happening, they're having him. They call me on Monday lunchtime to tell me to pick him up, he's not staying... luckily a friend agreed to be on stand-by jic this happened on Sunday, but very stressy for me.

They tell me he can go full-time after Easter. After Easter, they tell me they meant September. OK, OK, June then. WTF do I do? I can't have more unpaid leave because of this!

I get a new nursery that TUESDAY to take effect on FRIDAY - so DS has a visit for 30mins on Wednesday and is left for an hour Thursday before starting on Friday.

He has now quit the hospital nursery and started the local one full-time, but in the two months he was there:
He screams whenever we enter the place (he doesn't even cry when I say goodbye the other one, he loves it there and wants to leave me to go to his carer!).
He never had a peg with his name on. Petty maybe but he didn't belong.
He also never had a photo of him on the wall like the other children.
His "development book" - doesn't have. For TWO MONTHS this nursery has made no comment on his development, activities or anything. I find that hard to believe - surely he has done SOMETHING there.
He has no paintings etc to bring home.

The new place, he not only loves but has a peg, swipecard and duck; has done crafty stuff; the staff tell me what he's been up to without referring to a book or noticeboard for what he's eaten or what his nappies were like.

What I want to know is not if there's a problem with DS disliking it (all kids are different, I don't see DS's dislike as being a problems) but if I should complain about his lack of induction and the fact that they sent him home early that first day, plus his last day (he did really bad poos and apparently they've had a bug for 2 weeks, DS may have that, but I'd not been warned before this) and the lack of any development progress. I know that for the last few weeks they've known DS is leaving so that almost excuses the lack of peg and picture, but not the lack of any paintings (all the other kids have paintings on the wall, so clearly they do them) or a written development/progress book or progress plan - surely there should be this plan in the first month? If you are looking after a baby then you need to do things with them. I'm just peed off again that I've had to take time off because they can't cope with poos. And don't tell me about an illness going around. And he just isn't included. Maybe it's me being oversensitive, but what do you think?

[melbel]

I think good riddance to bad rubbish. yes you have every right to be upset about the way the first nursery handled things and yur son was obviously picking up on some not so friendly vibes there. By all means voice your issues but I would not expect to get any result from it especially since you are no longer there. they sound like an all important arrogant lot of twots and they will more than likely just brush you off as a pi$$ed off "ex" and leave it at that. But yes you are totally justified in your feelings...vent them and move on is my advice, try not to get hung up on them and instead focus on the wonderful rapport you are developing with his new nursery and the fact your son is now getting the attention and care that he deserves!

[Gigi]

well said MELBEL, i 2nd what you said.

but it's a great shame the first place mucked you about so much.

[MrsFabuloso]

I think I would still do something even though you're not using the service, just to save any other families the trouble. Maybe they need a kick up the butt? I'd write a letter to the director (or whomever is in charge) and tell them your concerns and the differences between the two places and how they made you feel. Maybe then that will help the first place improve? Although as the others said I wouldn't really expect any kind of response from them.

[Chocaholic]

I would write a letter of complaint to the nursery. I probably wouldn't take it any further but at least they will know exactly how bad their behaviour is, how it adversely affected your son (who they have a duty of care towards) and hopefully there will be someone who cares enough to try and correct it.

I would also put down that i would be unable to give a positive recommendation towards the centre if anyone asked and hope their management systems/behaviour improves dramatically in the near future.

They may not do anything but it will help you get past the situation a little faster (I hope) and you can rest easy knowing you have at least tried to help any other mothers considering placing their child there.

[Lulu]

That is absolutely appalling RH and I would be telling everyone how crap it is, including them.

[nickel]

I was at a daycare that was a bit like that.
It sounds like a crap place! I'm so glad your little one is now ok.
The staff are probably not supported and have crap systems. You could write to the director...but even better if you could, make an appointment to see her, and tell her. Cause they'll just ignore a letter ... won't they? They should know how it made you feel, and see your side of it. anyway, not having pegs and pix on the wall IS a big deal, cause you start to wonder - hey do you guys even know my kid is here?? And It sound like they weren't experienced enough to look after an upset child.

[Pandora]

Is there any sort of independant or governing body that audits nursery/daycare?
Over here there are a huge number of factors that day care centres are audited against, and the developmental stuff (not filling out the book, not doing any of the crafty stuff thats age appropriate etcs) would all be considered when they get their accreditiation, and they have to make their audit results available to you to look at.
DS' creche didt do muich in the way of drawings or paintings until he was 18mths old, as he was one of the oldest in the room and none of the other kids were up to that stage, though once he got to the point where he wanted to do it (drawing) a lot they arranged it so that he could and got in some activities from the older kids room.
It sounds like he is in a much better environment now!
Is the nursery he was at, at your workplace? If so would that make you apprehensive about complaining about them?

[Ca Plane Pour Moi]

I want to complain, it's just getting it right. Yes, it is at my workplace, but I'm leaving there in September. But I do work literally next door to the nursery!

Also, the bills I've had (money taken directly from my pay-packet) are for a child called XXX-al, not XXX-el (eg instead of the correct spelling you'd have Danial, Samual, Joal, Cal-Al etc). There are a few occurances of this and it really annoys me. Typos I can cope with as I have a bit of an A/E blind spot but it's hand-written there and no excuse for typos on bills!

I just want to get everything down and polished before I complain, but good idea to complain to OFSTEAD - they only really look at the National Curriculum practices though, not if children are happy or not. (Can't believe there is a national curriculum for a four-month-old now, how stupid.)