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Thread: bedtime stress

  1. #1
    mummycate Guest

    Angry bedtime stress

    My 10.5 month old DD used to sleep really well in her cot. She is strapped into a safeTsleep as she rolls at any opportunity and does not like being on her back. She won't sleep on her tummy either as she just crawls to play. For AGES! She has a dummy, only for when she's cranky or tired. I think she may be teething again.

    We've just moved to Brisbane from Sydney, and she has a different cot. But the problem is mainly, she's completely asleep in my arms and I get up to put her down. She's sleeping soundly until I get to the cot. And she wakes up before I even put her in. She fights sleep so much. Her dad used to just let her go to bed when she wanted, or would hold her upright until she fell asleep. Two things I can't do.

    I let her cry it out, and just keep laying her down until she sleeps. She has her bath in the morning because she has too much fun. Can you help with some settling ideas? TIA


  2. #2
    mummycate Guest

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    I could try rocking in the bedroom and not the loungeroom.

  3. #3

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    With my DD2, I rub on some bonjella and give her her dummy and that seems to settle her if she is teething. It usually takes a few times of going back in and stroking her head and singing to her but that normally seems to work.

    Are you giving her bonjella or anything if you think she's teething? It must hurt the poor little ones so much

    I hope things work out soon

  4. #4
    mummycate Guest

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    Already gave bonjela and teething relief at 1730 and had to wait until 2130 to give more. I just had to leave her and not check on her.

  5. #5

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    Really? I give bonjella all the time. Are you supposed to wait in between?

    (By the way, your little girl is gorgeous!)

  6. #6

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    Here is what I would do:

    If her teeth are genuinely bad, give some Nurofen
    Swap bath time to around 6.00pm
    Massage
    Then pj's and a cuddle and a final feed IN HER ROOM in the dark
    Rock/cuddle

    Then try putting her down.

    When she crawls round in her cot, is she crying, or happy? (I ask this because all 3 of mine got to a point at around 10 months where they would "chat" to themselves at bedtime, but not cry, and at first I was worried, and it even took up to 20 mins for them to go quiet and then eventually drop off, but they were happy, so I went with it.........)

    (I know you said that she has a lot of fun at bath time, but if you do it at night, this may give her the opportunity to unleash all that final energy in a fun way for you both, before she can crash in a cosy well fed, well cuddled heap of sleep.......)

    With my babies, if they fell asleep in my arms, they then woke and protested when I tried to put them down too. But if I let them drop off by themselves, they were fine. Kind of like all or nothing? So I knew that if I rocked them to sleep I would be holding them all night (which was fine sometimes, but not practical all the time) OR put them to bed awake and happy, and let them nod off by themselves. Just my experience.........
    Last edited by Lucy; December 24th, 2007 at 09:02 AM.

  7. #7
    mummycate Guest

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    Good ideas Lucy!

    I don't hold her to sleep anymore, I was digging my own grave and broke that habit. But last night I was trying to feed her when she nodded off.

    I didn't feel like doing the bath in the morning today, so am shifting it to tonight. Perhaps the bedtime bath and bedtime oil combo will help. And the feed and then cuddles will make her sleepy enough to be put down to fall asleep by herself.

  8. #8

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    Oh, Cate, I could have written your post myself! DS went through this and it is soooo hard to sort it out.

    Warm bath at night; splashing and having fun is OK! The warmth is soothing so will help.

    A regular story and lullaby. I think I already told you our routine. Regularity helps soothe babies.

    Do you have a sleep toy or sleep CD? Yes, it takes a little while to accept these items but once they do then it does help.

    Don't fret about going down and putting herself to sleep. I've only just managed (only the last 2 nights successfully!) to put DS to bed awake and pat him to sleep. I've been trying to do that since birth without him screaming. Soon we will start to cut out the patting. It's backbreaking to carry them (I had an hour of it this morning 6-7 as I won't let DS get up until 7) but if you relax and don't push it too much then it works. Just it's hard at the time (I'm still going through it, so do have sympathies).

    Other thoughts... she is sleeping quite a lot in the day. DS only has 2-3 hours sleep total - 2 more often than 3. Can you give her your old top to snuggle with? Plus changing anything after a life change is hard - which is why I'm changing feeding things AFTER Christmas as that's upheaval enough for DS!

    Oh, sleepy food. Porridge before bedtime works well here.

    HTH.

  9. #9

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    Cate, could you try patting her in her cot?? Rather than holding her or rocking her, maybe at the moment she just wants to know you are there with all the changes going on. Maybe sit next to the cot and see if she will settle that way?? Just an idea, hope it all gets better soon hun!

  10. #10
    mummycate Guest

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    I have tried patting before it doesn't work and also I had to do it at work and the babies were too used to it and took ages to go to sleep.

    I gave her a nice warm bath with bedtime wash, followed by bedtime oil massage and dinner (she didn't want it) and a bottle and a little play, and I put her down at 6.45pm and within ten minutes she was asleep. But woke a few times, I just popped dummy in, adjusted blankets and left her. She did really well. Perhaps it was the warm bath?? Or she was just really tired?

  11. #11
    mummycate Guest

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    She took 2 hours to go to sleep last night. I gave her teething relief and a top up.

    Tonight we have stress as we do every night. How do you get a baby to sleep who just won't lie down???

  12. #12

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    I don't know if this will help you, but my 11mth old doesn't go down till 8-830pm. We do dinner at 6pm, bath at around 7 then we dim the lights and read a story or two then its milk and bed! Sometimes she feeds to sleep, other times she's awake and we have a cuddle then I put her down and stay in her room for a few minutes and she's usually asleep!
    Hope it gets easier for you, hang in there - I guess it could take her a while to settle in to her new home.

  13. #13

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    Does she have a mobile or anything like that? DD2 has a fish tank thingy with lights which plays soothing music and she loves that, she just watches it and falls asleep. Maybe you could try something like that?

  14. #14
    mummycate Guest

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    There is a mobile but one of those old ones with the porcelain animals. It moves when I move it. She also has a light up poohbear. She likes something to cuddle to her face, usually a cloth nappy (not her bum ones of course!). But its the fact she doesn't like being on her back, and when on her tummy she will only crawl. Its very hard.

  15. #15

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    Catherine

    Is she upset as she crawls roudn the cot? Is she crying? Or just playing happily?

  16. #16

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    how long has she been crawling for? She is at an age where there is a lot of physical development stuff happening, and bubs tend to like to practice it at night for some reason.

    Also with the move and the upheaval it may take a while for her to settle into a pattern, it can be up to 3 weeks for DS to go back to normal when his sleeping patterns get out of whack.

    I hope it gets better for you soon. DS is going through some sleep issues again at the moment so I can sympathise with you

  17. #17
    mummycate Guest

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    She laughs and yells happily and crawls and stands and shakes the cot edges (her dancing). So when I put her on her back, she gets upset. She's been crawling for 3-4 months.

  18. #18

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    Try a mobile with music, I swear by ours! Georgia still stands up and bangs on her cot at least 3 times everytime I put her to bed but I just go back in and lay her down and eventually she stops. It must be so hard for you if she can do that for a couple of hours

    Have you tried just leaving her if shes happy and seeing how long it takes her to fall asleep by herself?

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