Thanks all, I feel so much better over the past couple of days. Bonnie seems a lot happier too - maybe just because I've chilled out a bit.

She's getting pretty good at the self-settling too. She only needs about 5-10 minutes of patting and she's off. She still wakes up exactly 45 minutes later though, and I've tried to stir her at the 30 min mark but with no success. What I'm doing is sitting by the bassinet at the 40 min mark to watch her sleep (I love looking at her when she's sleeping) and as soon as she wakes up, I start with the patting/bouncing again to send her off again. I find that it's the second settling that's the trickiest- this one takes about 20-30 mins for her.

I would happily get her up after the 45 min mark if she didn't need the sleep, but she really does need it, because she gets awfully cranky without it. Hopefully, when she's a bit older she'll be able to move through her sleep cycles.

The going to bed routine is working really well for me at the moment. It's nice to have some time in the evening that's baby-free.

Thanks for your advice, I wish I'd never gone off the gentle parenting track - but you live and learn.