My DS was exactly the same, in fact he had never slept in a cot at 10 mnths. The only thing that worked was going to sleep school at about 10 mnths and to be honest if I wasn't going back to work I would never have done it.

I was there for 4 nights and at the end when we came home he would at least go to sleep in the cot but now without a lot of crying/grizzling (debateable as to if it was grizzling as opposed to crying if you know what I mean and it would not be uncommon for him to do this for 20 - 40 mins - seriously did my head in ) this would be for his day sleep and he was still waking once or twice a night going through the same process. In the end as it was keeping dp awake and he needed to sleep to work (I suspect you don't let DD cry as it will wake the rest of your family) I would put DS to sleep in his cot at night and when he woke after 12amish I would sleep with him in the king single bed until morning.

It wasn't until he dropped to 1 day sleep at 14 mnths that the whole sleep thing become less stressful cause he was then really tired and really ready for bed but I wouldn't recommend at 10mnths dropping to 1 sleep just yet.

I then droped the midnight feed when DS was about 18 mnths and that was still about a week of crying with just water and cuddles. Now he still wakes at 12 am but goes back to sleep with a cuddle and he might wake about 3 am for a feed but almost always feeds from dawn until we get up between 7am and 8am a couple of times but as I co-sleep I don't notice soo much.

On those tough days it was really tough but I found that when I tried to make him sleep I stressed a lot more then when I just went with the flow. Giant as I remember how hard it is