Are we doing the wrong thing?

[Fleur]

Heaven hon you're getting yourself twisted up into knots about this. Maybe try not to think so much and trust yourself. You know when she really needs you and you're there for her. And trust her - she'll let you konw when she really needs you.
As DS has gotten older we've left him to his own devices more and more. He cries a bit, but I know if he goes to sleep then he is ok - there's no way he'd sleep if he's distressed. And anyway, he is sure to let us know if he really needs us.
It sounds like she is figuring things out in the post-feed-to-sleep world - it'll take a little time but it sounds like she's fine and you're doing great.

:yeahthat: Perfectly said!

I think you're doing a great job

[boomba]

This is so like DS1 its uncanny. He would wake and trash around but fell back to sleep. I would just pat his back or put my hand on him somewhere so he knew I was there.....he was still in our bed.

Good luck hun your doing a wonderful job...I think as long as you are there with her and not just leaving her to cry alone she will be ok x

[sloane]

it sounds like you're doing a great job...i figure, they get so used to feeding to sleep that there's going to be an adjustment period & if you feel like it's the right thing, then keep doing it. i can't believe how much her sleeps have improved - that's fantastic - you're obviously doing something right!! i reckon marcellus is right & there's no need to overthink this - just keep doing what you're doing & trust your instincts to know when she needs a cuddle & when she's settling herself

PS i know i've said it before, but you sooooo give me hope that there's sleep to be had in the future!!

[Mak]

Heaven - you are the expert on your DD - trust yourself and stick with your gut feeling! Don't beat yourself up!!!! xx

[Ginger]

does she go back to sleep quicker if you pull her into you and kind of spoon her? i do this with ds2 when i don't want to bfeed him back to sleep and it works wonders.
also remember that there's a huge difference between a protest whinge and a distressed cry.

[Heaven]

Thank you everyone! You've made me feel so much better! You're all right of course

olive & ginger- nope, I can't touch her, she pushes me away or kicks me and gets more upset, lol. Maybe she does jut want to be left to her own devices.

sloane- I'm glad I can give you hope! I remember feeling hopeless and like no one had ever had a baby that slept as badly as my DD but now I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Not much longer and you will too!!

[Olive]

DD does that too pushes me away... though ive found holding hands works excepts she holds on very tight to make sure i dont go