nurse Dan!
I think you feel exactly as most do on this forum-that's why we're here!
One of my closest friends is currently 6m pregnant with #2-both conceived in first month of trying, no problems with miscarriages etc.
I find out this time when she was 16w...and definately showing. She wanted to tell me face to face, and as we were away overseas for 4w and with it being Xmas etc, we had a gap of not seeing her which i now know was between her being 8 and 16w. Soooo I find out when she opens her front door when we arrive to stay with her for a long weekend.....an obvious bump and glowing mum to be. That was one of the hardest weekends. Luckily DH is so understanding, and helped me thru' it. But I have to say, i've not seen her as much as I would normally, but hopefully i'll work thru' this.
Keep trying to be positive