****. Ok. I'm going to have to post it.

Monday week 1

135kg

yes that's right...BIGGER than when I started my last diet. Hmmmm.

And I can't seem to find my motivation atm. When I am committed, I am a steamroller, seriously tough. I KNOW I can do this. But I have to get there, mentally, to start with, and I'm just not there right now, and I don't know how to get there

ETA - although I have to say, this is he weight at which I am 'feeling' it. Like, I never felt fat, and I would be surprised when I saw photos of myself or caught sight of myself unexpectedly. But the last 5kg, I am feeling them. I feel fat, yuck, uncomfortable in my skin now.