i ruined my body - and now im sufferning for it ..

[*charmalea*]

thanks guys !

MR -thanks for saying i have a nice face , i honestly thought/think its the worst part of me , ovbiously i have big issues about it .

I think my body issues stem from when an ex i had in high school ( actually my ist reall boyf , the one who took my virginity ) told me , Id be the perfect girlfriend if i was a lot thinner and had more "common knowlegde " about things .. :0 (i was a sz 12 in high school , normal size)

so basically to him i was fat and dumb ... .. he broke my heart and i hear his comments in my head all the time ..

[MrsFabuloso]

hun. I'm sorry you're going through and have been through so much. I have huge issues with myself too, but it is opposite for me in that I can't stop eating and putting weight on at the moment. I was exactly the same size as you when I met DH at 19 until my first m/c, and have steadily put about 5 kg's on after each pg. Now I'm up to about 85kg and have never been so fat. I hate it. I had issues before this too, all my life actually, probably from my dad and brothers I think. Anyway, I didn't want this to be about me, lol!! But I have some idea of how you feel.

A thought occored to me reading your story, could you have a hormone imbalance maybe? Perhaps your thyroid? I'd definately see a doctor and have some testing done.

[*Beema*]

Lea and lots of big squishy

You have really had a struggle over the years, I don't think I will have a true understanding as I have not been in your shoes, but perhaps a small part of it.

I would speak with a Dr about the recent weight loss, I too have been concerned with mine. End of January I was 70kg (had dropped to 68 post bub, but went back up to 70), decided I wanted to lose 10kg (I was 64 pre preg, but I was doing a lot of weights so a lot more muscle), lost 7 and was happy at 63kg, then the rest just started to fall off, I stopped trying to lose weight and it has just fallen off.

Recently I have recieve a LOT of comments about my size, accopaied with a look of concern, I bought a new pair of size 8 jeans and they are too big, I am 165cm too and 58kg, I do not want to lose any more weight, may face is looking very thin, you can really see it, I am glad that it is winter and I can cover up. So I can understand just that small part of you story.

Comments made by you EX have cut very deeply and were made at a time where they can have the biggest impact, and it seem that they have continued to play a huge role in your life, and they often rise when one is feeling vulnerable. I hope you can see past these with time and know that you are a beautiful person, and that it doesn't matter what others think of your size, if you can search deep within yourself and find that size where you are most happy and find a way to be achieve that.

I struggled with being happy with my size for many years until I found a PT who made me

I don't know if any of that helps, if not, please take comfort that we are here to support you
Take care
xxoo