123

thread: Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

  1. #19
    Registered User

    Mar 2008
    North Northcote
    8,065

    i try to just pick up throughout the day. usually if it is before the kids are in bed then no, he sees the house warts and all, but if, like tonight he gets home after they are in bed, then yeah the house is tidy...i always do a quick clean up/sort of things before they go to bed...clean tidy room = better sleep in my thinking

  2. #20
    Registered User

    Mar 2007
    6,900

    I do. DH certainly doesn't expect it and we share a lot of the cleaning. Obviously I do more though because I'm a SAHM and he works. DH is usually the one who cooks dinner though so I just think it's nicer for him to come home to a tidy house, especially kitchen because he usually starts cooking soon after he gets home. And I don't like doing the cleaning after he's home. I'd rather sit and talk to him. So I will usually tidy everything up and then set up something to keep the girls interested so I can catch up with him while he's cooking.

  3. #21
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Melbourne
    3,300

    Yes I do (what cleaning and tidying I do - I am fairly domestically challenged), but is more to do with timing than anything else - because there is little point doing all day long because just gets in a state again, but the only time I have the TV on is the hour before DH is home, while I am doing tea, doing other dishes and tidying bits and pieces (when I am not working that is). Once the kids are in bed I want to chill so don't want to leave it to do later. Also really I am a complete slob - and sometimes I don't want DH to see that (it isn't the kids always although I do blame them sometimes )- when I was at home job seeking the kids were in daycare all day and I would often still do a mad tidyup before picking them up and DH getting home. Each to their own I reckon, different things work for different families - all DH likes is the side in the kitchen to be free for him to put the groceries down on (as he often does shopping on the way home) and for him to be able to prepare his meal for lunch the next day (and often mine too now am working).

  4. #22
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Newport, VIC
    1,885

    Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

    I tidy up, but it's not for DH. And on the days when he's home earlier than me, he also does the same.

  5. #23
    Registered User

    Sep 2008
    Adelaide
    3,201

    Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

    I do, DS and I do a tidy up together so we can spend time with Dad when he gets home. He doesn't expect it, but I know he appreciates it. On the days the place is a bit of a mess, DH will pitch in when he gets home

  6. #24
    Senior Moderator

    Nov 2004
    Chickens.
    4,989

    Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

    One of the reasons that a) I don't have a DP and b) I have a cleaner.

    When I was married, no I didn't.

  7. #25
    BellyBelly Member
    Add xXHopeXx on Facebook

    Jan 2010
    Penrith, NSW
    1,075

    Re: Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

    I like to have the house clean when dh comes home. I know he hates mess, as do I, and hed honestly rather the house tidy than dinner nearly ready. Most times I have both done, because hes home at about 8-8.30pm, midnight, or 8am (shift worker) all of which generally give me enough time to get dd to help clean her mess, I clean the rest, have dinner fixed up and be relaxing on the couch waiting for him (either that or sleeping ) and when he's on day shift most of the time dd is asleep by the time he gets homeso its given me a chance to clean and keep the house clean too.
    Having said that, dh does not EXPECT it, but tbh, I kind of do of myself. We only have a little house and one child so its not too hard to make the place look tidy and have most things done. If it stays messy for ages usually dh will mention something, but if I'm busy or working he will either not mind, or clean the house himself, depending where he is on his work days.

  8. #26
    Registered User

    Sep 2012
    Sydney, NSW
    1,123

    Yep. Im off work at the moment and although DP doesn't really say so, he does expect it. Just as I would of him if he were off work for a while.

  9. #27
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    I guess like some of you have mentioned, when I was working and DH got home before me I loved coming home to a (fairly) clean house and dinner cooking. It would make me feel so happy when walking in the door so maybe why that's why I like to do it where possible. Also, near the end of my pregnancy I was not allowed to do much so I hated the mess. Maybe I'm making up for it?

  10. #28
    Administrator
    Add Rouge on Facebook

    Jun 2003
    Ubiquity
    9,922

    Expect? No. But I like to do it because it's our love language. He also does it for me when he's at home. But he also helps out the second he walks in the door, or when I'm not able to do my share. I got a keeper And so did he!

  11. #29
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    Expect? No. But I like to do it because it's our love language. He also does it for me when he's at home. But he also helps out the second he walks in the door, or when I'm not able to do my share. I got a keeper And so did he!
    DH is exactly the same. I was feeding DD2 when he got home today so he came straight in and continued cleaning up from where I left off cleaning up from DD1s dinner. We cook probably 50/50 too.

  12. #30
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    Expect? No. But I like to do it because it's our love language. He also does it for me when he's at home. But he also helps out the second he walks in the door, or when I'm not able to do my share. I got a keeper And so did he!
    DH is exactly the same. I was feeding DD2 when he got home today so he came straight in and continued cleaning up from where I left off cleaning up from DD1s dinner. We cook probably 50/50 too.

  13. #31
    Registered User

    Jul 2010
    Rural NSW near ACT
    413

    I have a whole routine.....I think I'm weird after reading this.
    Hubby usually leaves home to ride his bike at about 6 am so After DS has his morning feed I pack him into the pram and we go muck out stables down the paddock and turn the horses out (feed up change rugs, lunge who needs a move etc). Then come back in for brekky. While he eats I eat on the run, unpack dishwasher, put on a load of washing, do some dusting and clean kitchen from hubbys brekky and ours. I then make the bed, tidy the washing away from the day before as DS plays and "helps" (he's getting really good at putting undies away). We usually then have a play or he gets in his swing while I hang out washing. We then walk dogs about 2-3 km (him in pram).....
    After lunch I usually vacuum, shop, tidy or clean a bit with the little fellow tagging along.Sometimes a spot of fencing, a swim in his pool, some weeding or another outside thing Yesterday he "helped" the farrier. We stop for heaps of games in the arvo. This tends to reduce the playroom to a warzone!
    He eats dinner about 5 when I usually organise the rest of dinner if needed or do more in the kitchen. Then we go and put the horses up for the night and feed up. We water the vegies then get back in about 5.45.
    We put away toys and stuff and dance to music and his dad usually gets home about 6 and joins in. Then we do bath and bed together and hubby and I generally sit down to dinner a little after 7.
    I think perhaps I am a control freak............
    I think I should work as hubby is working so I treat things a bit like a job. When I work on the week-end hubby doesn't get as much done but then we let it slide a bit on week-ends and I don't work full days ...........

  14. #32
    Registered User

    Jul 2010
    Rural NSW near ACT
    413

    I have a whole routine.....I think I'm weird after reading this.
    Hubby usually leaves home to ride his bike at about 6 am so After DS has his morning feed I pack him into the pram and we go muck out stables down the paddock and turn the horses out (feed up change rugs, lunge who needs a move etc). Then come back in for brekky. While he eats I eat on the run, unpack dishwasher, put on a load of washing, do some dusting and clean kitchen from hubbys brekky and ours. I then make the bed, tidy the washing away from the day before as DS plays and "helps" (he's getting really good at putting undies away). We usually then have a play or he gets in his swing while I hang out washing. We then walk dogs about 2-3 km (him in pram).....
    After lunch I usually vacuum, shop, tidy or clean a bit with the little fellow tagging along.Sometimes a spot of fencing, a swim in his pool, some weeding or another outside thing Yesterday he "helped" the farrier. We stop for heaps of games in the arvo. This tends to reduce the playroom to a warzone!
    He eats dinner about 5 when I usually organise the rest of dinner if needed or do more in the kitchen. Then we go and put the horses up for the night and feed up. We water the vegies then get back in about 5.45.
    We put away toys and stuff and dance to music and his dad usually gets home about 6 and joins in. Then we do bath and bed together and hubby and I generally sit down to dinner a little after 7.
    I think perhaps I am a control freak............
    I think I should work as hubby is working so I treat things a bit like a job. When I work on the week-end hubby doesn't get as much done but then we let it slide a bit on week-ends and I don't work full days ...........

  15. #33
    Registered User
    Add Butterfly Dawn on Facebook

    Aug 2008
    Climbing Mt foldmore
    2,894

    Re: Does anyone else feel the need to clean before your partner gets home?

    your days sound great - we wanna come live with you

  16. #34
    BellyBelly Member

    Jan 2010
    2,793

    Kateo - your day sounds great! I guess I think of it a bit as my 'job' too on weekdays. By the way, I'm slightly jealous you live on a farm (or at least a large amount of land), reminds me of growing up. I'm determined to have more land again someday.

  17. #35
    Registered User

    Mar 2009
    2,269

    Nope but I do have things in order by the time DP gets home mostly becauae I would rather not spend our evening time together cleaning. My general routine is make as much mess as possible in the morning, have lunch then everyone pitches in to tidy up before spending the afternoon outside. Works great.

    We have a pretty even distribution of home duties considering DP works. I do breakfast and lunch dishes (no dishwasher), we do dinner prep (or one does and the other entertains the kids) and cleaning together (after the kids are in bed), we settle one girl each to bed, every few days DP puts on washing on his way out then I hang it when I take the girls outside, the girls and I pack up our daily mess then on the weekend DP vacuums and I do the bathroom.

  18. #36
    Registered User

    Jun 2005
    Perth
    1,454

    Yes I do. I know how annoying it can be when you walk in the door, after being out, to be confronted by chaos - I only do what I would expect to be done back if that makes sense?

    When DH or I come home we park our cars in the garage and then access the house via a door that leads from the garage into the kitchen. From there you can see our dining and lounge area. I always try to have that area looking tidy, doesn't necessarily have to be spick and span, but at least it looks "calm". Like someone else mentioned, my DH works long hours and I treat being a SAHM as a job and I have no problems with that.

    DH does not expect anything at all, I do it because I want to do it and also it means that when he comes home we can actually spend more quality time together instead of having to clean up everything.

123