Great posts everyone with really good points. Lots of things have come up for me so this might be a ramble & I might repeat what others have said... Forgive me!

Skeetaboat I also lament that if a woman currently preparing for birth doesn't arm herself with loads of knowledge that she can face problems having a positive birthing experience.

However, a large component (I believe) of the lack of birth choice is the way "we" seem to hand over our care to others. We are not responsible - we give over the hard decisions to others. We defer to the knowledge of others rather than seeking out information for ourselves.

We don't listen to our bodies, learn to be "friends" with our bodies. Our bodies somewhere along the track became a mystery to us - one that can only be solved by "the specialist"... Women cycled with the moon, celebrated their Womanness, felt inside their bodies, listened to the subtle clues. Now, that knowledge has all but died in a great many of us. How do you "feel" isn't as important as what the blood test says or the u/s or the ctg. With all the machines that go beep we have saved some lives no doubt - a wonderful thing. But we have also taken with it the innate knowledge that Women had/have.

We trust in drugs before herbs, support & trust. Of course there is a time for medicalisation - I love science & medicine. But we have to learn when to invite it in.

Someone mentioned we take a lot of time to make decisions like marriage etc. I know for me I didn't really... I listened to my heart - but ignored what my head was screaming! I wonder how many of us did that? I didn't weigh up the character I was truly seeing. I had projected on to him what I thought he could be - what I saw sometimes... I ignored the very distinct character flaws that were very obvious... How many women marry men or have children with men who drink excessively, gamble, take drugs, can't commit to jobs/family/friends, have large debts...

None of the above make one a "bad person"... However surely they should raise alarms. But like in my experience (where I ignored my partners ability to just walk away/lack of commitment/blame of others) we project what we think we see, or what we want to see. It's not real it's projection. So really its our responsibility when we are shown what was there all the time - but without the flowers & sexual excitement of those early days of a romance...

I know that's tough stuff but it's something I have had to face over the last year or so. That my marriage failed because I married someone who showed me who he was - but I chose not to believe it!

Nelle brought up interesting points about choice with purchases - to choose organic free range eggs is respomnsible consumerisim (IMO) yet it may not be responsible to the family... I struggle with this at times also.

Anyway no doubt I will come back and add to this!