hitting on the point of 'little death' that inanna speaks of is, i believe an important concept. transition is not just about the cervix dialating from 8 to 10 cms. it is a transition where the conscious mind is not needed, and in fact can be the hinderance. and like inanna mentioned, that is where problems can occur for a birthing woman. At least this is how i experienced it the first time around. during this critical time of transition (and yeah i am talking from a holistic POV of the mind, body and soul itms) a woman needs , gentle guidance and the knowledge that she is protected so that her conscious mind can be put at rest (this, to me, is also a moment of 'little death'), so that her subconscious can take over and she can fully surrender to the transition of her baby and her body to bring a new life earthside. I am of course, speaking from my own personal experiences and have noted the difference that care and the right to 'choice' has had on my two birth experiences. my first transition represented fear, agony and a surrender...BUT the surrender wasnt to myself and my baby it was to the system. during transition my OB was called, the lights went up, they all got kitted out in gowns, gloves and massive goggles (true story lol). there was no reassurance for my conscious mind, in fact, quite the opposite. the system that i found myself in required my conscious mind there: to answer questions, to shift onto my back with my legs up, and importantly to PUSH. i became exhausted. my subconscious was needing to be allowed in, my physical body was tired from the struggle and transition and birth was a fight against myself, something that i had no way of knowing was going to happen until it did.

my subsequent birth and transition i can honestly say was the most beautiful moment i have yet experienced. the transition between my daughter and I birthing that day is highlighted by the silent support and guidance of my care-providers who respected and recognised when my subconscious was taking over and helped gently guide me through that process of accepting the 'little death' that was sitting in the corner. All my DH can really recall of transition is the quietness that was interspersed by gentle laughter (at my babies antics as she descended into the birth canal) and my simple declaration that 'the baby is coming'. transition this time was without fear, pain, pushing. Instead it was about welcoming my baby and gently talking to her as we achieved that moment of birth together. there is nothing so beautiful as talking sweetly to your unborn child in that moment. honest.

this then brings us back to the concept of choice and what that means in a birth space. can we achieve a transition without fear when placed in settings that are less than ideal (ie, when there is a cascade of intervention or a planned/unplanned C/S...i believe the answer is YES!). this is where (again) i agree with Inanna that we need to understand birth not only in physiological terms (i believe that this is also important...especially in understanding the phsyiology for example of labouring with a posterior baby and understanding those mechanisms, not to mention the role of the uterus in the process of birth, but i digress) but in terms of the spiritual journey that mother and baby are taking (and for me personally that each member in attendance of the sacred act of birth...which is why i feel choosing who is in your birth space is the first BIG step in owning your choices).

in terms of my personal birth plan this time around, i chose carefully from the get go. from the moment that BFP came up. i chose my carers, my support, my space and i spent the journey of pregnancy preparing as best as i could to achieve the outcome that myself and my baby and my family needed. people may laugh at the depth of of my birth 'plan' as it included all varieties of wildcards. but in the end it was a precious document that was tailored to our needs as a family and made my conscious mind feel secure and at peace: come what may. and that for me, is the important concept contained within 'choice': peace.