dont beleive talking to brother will benefit anything.opinions, similar stories,pls

[sue1386]

I've learnt that when some people start to attack someone in pain and accuse them of things that are not the case, bandying about various words that are not the case in that situation, then its direspectful, insensitive and not worth trying to correct the various incorrect statements
though i will say,
its not about blame its about legitimate pain,
i have mentioned I am extremely proactive, its not about that he thought i made wrong decisions,
i didnt stay in a bad marriage for 28 yrs i suffered and probably still am for 28 years despite being very proactive,
i do focus on good but legitimate pain comes up at times no need to try to put me down for that! though on forums there will always be those who will.
comparing my situation to others can have some legitimate points but it can also be incorrect when there are various major critical differences.

its hard to clarity every detail in a post and unnecesary as i only wanted one thing veiwpoints of how i can look at the pain i feel about my brother.

some people legitimately want to help and express things respectfully.forums are full of all types sincere and bullies,those who try to help and those who perhaps misunderstand the balance of things mentioned, or simply want drama and a feeling and superiority and lack the sensitivity needed for others pain or emotional issues. they show more about themselves by how they answer than about the situation they are talking about.


lt may be due to insensitivity, or lack of personal insight and experience, or their view colored by some other situation that has some similarity but many very critical differences, , or an excuse to themselves, to let themselves off the hook of being loving. or the lack of clarity about every detail that takes them on a tangent to the specific question. Maybe some feel superior labling many situations blanketly with words that arent the case in that situation.

whatever the case i thank those who gave respectful legitimate options that were helpful.