Learning how to stop being impulsive...

[Lulu]

Just don't do it.

I don't think there is more to it. If you really have a problem, if it's one thing in particular then don't put yourself in the situation that you will have to make the decision.

[Teeki]

Just don't do it.

I don't think there is more to it. If you really have a problem, if it's one thing in particular then don't put yourself in the situation that you will have to make the decision.

Good point. We've found that when we're off to see in-laws or go to the city, if we know exactly what we're going for and avoid everything else it's easier. We still want to buy something, but can avoid it. Also if you take more time to consider if you *really* need or want to do something, you might decide don't actually need/want it

[C~Q]

I Don't know if its as simple as that. It's not one thing, it's pretty much me and my nature. I just don't want to be that person anymore, I want to be sensible and be able to stand back and think about how things effect my future, not just that moment.

[Tinks]

Also if you take more time to consider if you *really* need or want to do something, you might decide don't actually need/want it

This is a good point.

Before you do something impulsive think about whether it's something you 'need' to do as opposed to 'want' to do. If it's something you need, go for it. If it's a want, think twice.

[Enchanted]

I can be a bit of a shocker for this. I try and work off the method of... If you see something and like it, walk away and leave it. If you still really want/need it the next day go back and get it. Usually stops me!

[C~Q]

It's not really "things" like purchases i'm talking about though...more like situations iykwim??

[thepixie]

Maybe you have to think a bit further ahead - think "sure it will be fun at the time, but how will I feel in the morning, next week or next month" and really try to imagine that bad feeling when you have given into the impulse IYKWIM? Like getting drunk - fun at the time but think of the hangover if that analogy works for you.

[Inanna]

I understand what you're saying CQ & I don't think it's as easy as not doing it.
Impulsivity is a symptom of a number of bigger "issues"... Most noteably ADHD & ASD.
If it was as simple as not doing it then we'd all be fabbo people! Firstly don't be beating yourself up. You've identified something that's an issue in your life - something that many people never do. So that's a great start.
Think about if there are particular areas that you are more likely to be impuslive or is it across the board?
Seek out some professional help as there are cognitive therapies that can help & if it is a case of ther ebeing other issues sometimes meds can help. (for ADHD etc).
It's not unheard of for people to go through their whole lives until adulthood and not realise there are some special areas that need help (like adhd)
I certainly am not suggesting that this is the problem - just that it is among the possibilities. Don't discount anything. You are a thinker, you spend time looking at how you fit in the world. That is a brilliant thing - good on you.
I hope you can get some answers.

[ladybird11]

I think that sort of 'sensible' thinking is seriously drilled into my head due to my full time job. Police are 'always' on duty - and if for instance, if my next door neighbour knew that me and DH are Police and they aren't happy with e.g. a party we may be having outside - when they complain (to the police ON duty) we can get in more strife than if anyone else was to do the same thing. (Hence the reason we hide our uniform and never hang it up outside or in view of others).

I don't have the freedom to say and do half the things I'd like due to my role in a large, para-military organisation, which, if word got out that I said something 'unprofessional' or didn't do something right, it'll come back to bite me in the butt. Like if I didn't do all things necessary in attendance at a crash scene I could end up being drilled in court, or worse yet, Coroner's court.

A part of that strict thinking does follow me into my personal life to an extent, and I find myself wishing I could have more freedom to say and do things off the cuff every now and then. I always have to think 'whats the worse thing that could happen' and / or 'is there any chance this could have a negative impact on me at work'....I'm sure that could be relayed to fit most situations?