if we are talking about a 'true' way of thinking in terms of everyday emotional input/output as to our self view of parenting then, i agree with your sentiment. we need to give ourselves a break.

But, if we are talking in relation to threads that people put on here seeking reassurance or alternatives then i wholeheartedly disagree with the sentiment. it is way too PC and 'perfectionist'.

what i like about BB is that you can get a chance to express whatever deep hidden self doubts/insecurities taht you may have about the way you are conducting pregnancy, birth and baby. it is a forum that is there for learning. and sometimes when a fear is new and confronting the first thing that you feel is 'bad' or like the 'worst mother' and IMHO it is AOK to come on here and seek some guidance/support/whoop-ass to get you back on track or, alternatively to learn to trust your way. if someone wants to come on here and confide their fears (and have no other way of doing it IRL due to a lack of 'village' then i am all for it and will always strive to help/guide/kick up the butt as much as i can offer.
I agree with you Cassius - I've just been trying to work out how to word it all morning .

I think the negative labels need to stop. Really, is anyone a 'bad mother'? You'd have to be pretty shocking to actually have that label. As mothers we all make mistakes and we learn from those mistakes - but those mistakes don't make us bad mothers. We all want what is best for our children, and do the best job we can raising them.

But, like Cassius said, I think it's important that we should be able to come to BB to admit those mistakes, and be given reassurance that it's okay. Not that the mistake was okay, but that the fact we made it is okay, we've learnt from it, and can move on. I always feel much better once I've confided something I've done that I'm not proud of, or wish I'd done differently. It helps me to clarify what I did, how I feel, and what I wish to do in the future.

I'm all for being confident with choices, but a lot of the 'bad mum' threads I've seen haven't really been related to choice. These little mistakes we make aren't always choices - they're the result of us being imperfect human beings. We're all learning, and part of the learning experience is that 'debrief' after a mistake.