Personally i don't think the feeling goes away for a long time. maybe once the youngest is a teen and we can do adult things again it does.
for us its not a question of what we want but what we can afford. if we won lotto we would go another timeor two but at some time we had to make a choice and we always knew 3 was affordable for us. any more than that and the babies we already have would have to give things up, and we would struggle too much.
but that urge is still there. DH is having the chop as soon as he is old enough so we know it wont happen.
I find it sad sometimes to think i will never have another baby, but i also find it exciting knowing my babies are growing up.
From conversations I've had with mums who have completed their families, the longing for another baby never entirely goes away, but yes, it does fade over time. I think it's just part of the maternal instinct you know, go forth and multiply?
I guess there comes a point when we listen to our heads and not our hearts and know that the time has come for us - but only you can decide that! For me, this will be our last baby. Physically, mentally and emotionally I am ready to stop. DH is in agreement but his reasons are more financial.
Big help huh?? LOL!
Last edited by Willow; February 19th, 2009 at 06:32 AM.
I cant believe I'm admitting this, but I want more too...
I just wish the feeling would go away... but it is soo strong... Ad was meant to go get the chop, and 2 days after Angel I said no, dont, I'm not finished!!!
Financially we just cant, but the urge is definatly there, and I keep thinking "what if I regret NOT having another one? I certainly wouldn't regret having one!"
But in reality, its just silly to keep having children because I want to, so we wont be having another. There is sooo much to consider, esp the other kids... although they keep asking if we are getting another one!!!
I hope someone comes in and tells us it goes away, or what to do if it doesnt......
But hey, 4 kids is a small family to me, go for it... I love my large familt to pieces!!!!
Actually I do think it goes away after a while. Willow will tell you, I struggled for a long time because I wanted another baby after we had Charlie, and DH didn't.
So I got angry with him, and resented him and for a long time, felt like that longing was something I'd never get over.
But to be honest, I have gotten of it. I didn't realise how much until a couple of nights ago when Charlie was climbing all over DH, and DH asked me if I thought he was lonely, and were we wrong to not try for another child.
Two years ago I would have cried from how happy I was that he was actually thinking about another child.
And yet two nights ago, I went completely silent with shock, and realised how much I actually have accepted that we aren't having any more kids, and I actually don't want to have any more now.
That was a revelation because I never, ever thought I'd see the day where I wouldn't want another child. But there you go. I actually don't.
OH yeah, I'm totally fine about not having any more. I LIKE giving them back after a cuddle now, and that newborn smell just reminds me of my babies, it doesn't make me long for another one.
Oh Kim it is horible being torn over the issue of whether or not to have more kids. I get so clucky around newborns and I can sit and cuddle them all day and wish they were mine, but when it gets to the end of the day and I have to get my 2 year old into bed, i am thankful there are no other babies in my house.
I know that I dont want any more babies with DS dad, but i can imagine myself being happy to have a couple more in many years time if I meet a lovely guy.....
Oh Kim it is horible being torn over the issue of whether or not to have more kids. I get so clucky around newborns and I can sit and cuddle them all day and wish they were mine, but when it gets to the end of the day and I have to get my 2 year old into bed, i am thankful there are no other babies in my house.
I know that I dont want any more babies with DS dad, but i can imagine myself being happy to have a couple more in many years time if I meet a lovely guy.....
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