First of all, we decide what works for us each year. If I would like to go visit my family interstate, usually because we haven't done it for a year or two at Xmas, then that's what we organise. If we're here, we decide if we want to have Xmas at our house with the ILs invited, or not. Or sometimes we go away straight after Xmas for our own family holiday. Some years we like to take a family holiday alone, or with friends, or to visit extended family.
Once we've chosen what we want to do, we let our families know. This year, we aren't committing to anything on Xmas Day, but normally we allocate some time with MIL that includes BIL and SIL if we are in town. Basically, if plans don't mesh, they don't mesh. We refuse to get bogged down in the politics. Like you, we like to have our Xmas morning at home with present opening, etc. Everyone else for us comes after our own family and our DD.
So far, we've had very little upset over Xmas. Which is very surprising given the amount of kerfuffle my MIL can create at other times of the year! In our case, we're never sure how things are going to be between us and my MIL and then between my MIL and BIL/SIL, so it's impossible to plan around them.
This year, I have the perfect excuse not to host Xmas and not to lock in anything definite. We'll be playing it by ear, pretty much on the day. We've said we will most likely come over some time during the morning, as long as I'm not in labour, but we won't commit to staying for any length of time. And we don't expect anyone to make any plans around us.
Last edited by Jennifer13; October 18th, 2011 at 12:59 PM.
Which is very surprising given the amount of kerfuffle my MIL can create at other times of the year! In our case, we're never sure how things are going to be between us and my MIL and then between my MIL and BIL/SIL, so it's impossible to plan around them.
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