Some great points in this thread.

Lions and Bears said it well - it's got to be about the children and what's best for them.

Will telling your family now really help? Wouldn't it just give them time to stew on it and cause problems now? I'm sure whether or not they know it now, they can still object if it came to it. And the very fact it's in your will would tell them that it's what you want.

Divvy would be really interested to know about if you can make it binding in the will. It's a bit scary to think the family nutters could cause problems!!