thread: how to decide what to call grandparents

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  1. #1
    Registered User

    Oct 2006
    Sydney NSW
    4,837

    I let all those involve choose their own names!! Its not my decision at all or my DH's. We have Grandma and Grandad and Gran and Pop- their choice.



    ETA- I had 2 grandmas and 2 grandads growing up and I seem to have turned out OK!!

  2. #2
    Administrator
    Add Rouge on Facebook

    Jun 2003
    Ubiquity
    9,922

    I agree it's their choice not anyone elses LOL!

  3. #3
    Registered User

    Feb 2008
    Near the Snowies!
    2,975

    DD's grandparents chose what they wanted to be called. MIL is Nanna...and I'm still not totally sure what my parents want to be called as they've never actually said

    i don't think there's anything wrong with having two Pa's. to avoid confusion you could always call them Pa [surname].

  4. #4
    Registered User

    Oct 2008
    Victoria
    4,601

    I don't see why you can't have two Pa's.

  5. #5
    Registered User

    Dec 2008
    Brisbane, QLD
    5,171

    Huge 's We left the grandparents to decide. My Dad has decided he wants to be called "Grumps" until he's "old enough to be a Grandad" lol, my step- mum is "Nanna Ann", my Biological mum, MIL and FIL still cant decide what they want to be called "because they are not old enough" to be any of the traditional names so have been labeled "Gran" 's and "Grandpa". They've had 20months to decide and still haven't come up with anything so they can just suck it up. Lol

    I would suggest making your DH tell your Dad he cant be "Pa" or ask him how you should do it, make him see it's not as easy as he's making it out to be. Would that make a difference or would he not really care?

    Other than that hun I have no idea. He sounds like he's being a bit childish IMO. I hope you can sort something out.

  6. #6
    Registered User

    May 2007
    Home
    2,050

    I'm sure bubby will decide!! haha!

    We always called my dad, 'grandad'. But DD has always called him 'dewey'. NO IDEA where it came from! LOL
    But it's stuck!

    Let the parents argue over it, i agree!

  7. #7
    Registered User

    Jul 2007
    melb
    8,498

    This is something that really irratated me!!

    When preg with DS1 my mum said she was going to be Nanna and Dad said Grandpa cool all good.
    Mil and Fil were going to Oma and Opa (FIL is dutch) but a few weeks after DS1 born she decides she wants to be Nanna as a friend told her she should be grr and FIL decides grandpa!!! I wanted different from each other grrrr. MIL wants to be nanna first name where as I dont like kids using first names, I would be prefer nanna surname!!

  8. #8
    Registered User

    Oct 2007
    Perth,WA
    2,942

    Why not suggest G-Pa?

    I had 2 granddads, a nanny and an oma

    My kids have Nanny, Nanny T, Granddad and Granddad Rabbi....the mil wanted to be called her nickname but i said no way, as i wanted that level of respect to be there iykwim

    good luck with it all....dont let it be a big thing between you and your dh

  9. #9
    BellyBelly Life Subscriber

    Jan 2006
    11,633

    I agree, don't let it be a big thing for you and DH. You may well find that your kids decide this for themselves anyway.

    I call my parents, who DS sees regularly, granma and grandad. DS calls them "gee-gee" and "do-do". And DH's parents are "gee-gee bok-bok" and "do-do bok-bok" (the bok-bok is for the chickens at the place we were staying when we visited DH's family last year)
    My parents wanted to be called OB1 and OB2. I will leave it to your imagination to figure out what the OB stands for... I was not impressed.

    So anyway, the moral of this story is, you never quite know what you might end up with.

  10. #10
    Registered User
    Add Sterla on Facebook

    Jun 2008
    Tasmania
    3,011

    We let them decide, and we ended up with quite an assortment! DS has a Mormor, a Poppa, a Nin and a Grandad.

  11. #11
    Registered User

    Aug 2008
    Ouiinslano
    5,303

    marcellus, your DS is a crack-up!

    We are going through this too - DH's parents are already Nanny and Poppy, so they get to hang on to those. Maybe not "traditional" but I really want this baby to be close to its cousins, and part of that is calling the grandparents the same name.

    The issue? My mum can't handle anything that makes any recognisable connection to the word grandmother. Nanna, Nanny, Gran, Grandma, they're all out. I think she might be pushing for "Ma" but I think it's silly.

    I don't know whether that really contributes much! I would tell your DH to stick "tradition" as it's a flimsy tradition anyway.

  12. #12
    Registered User

    Sep 2005
    In the middle of nowhere
    9,362

    My mum and dad were already Nan and Pop to my sisters kids so theirs stayed the same - can't have different grandkids calling them different stuff. Even though i am a let them shoos their own I have to say I really disliked my ILs wanting to be called the same thing as my parents (cos I really don't like them) so we insisted on Grandma and Grandpa so DD would know the difference. She has two Nans though that are DH's Nans too though.

    Your step sister's little guy is related to your dad, families are made of always love not always blood. DH is my family and we aren't blood relatives. DF is your family and he isn't your blood relative. Yes I agree he's being silly. sweetie. Try not to get stressed over it now. It will often sought itself out without you realising. Perhaps you could bring up some cool grandparent names in a discussion one day and they (the ILs) take a fancy to them all by themselves.
    I do however get why your DH is senitmental about those names. When I was a little girl I was quite sentimental about my Nana and Pop and I got quite agressive when DHs parents wanted to be that to my little girl - not that I'm saying DH doesn't like your family, but i get why he's hanging onto his train of thought too.

  13. #13
    Registered User

    Aug 2009
    in the victorian bush.
    286

    we have a Nanny and Pop (DH parents) and a Nangee and Gramps (my parents). My mum wanted to be called nanny as well but she decided it was going to be too confusing for our DD so she decided on Nan the G for the start of her surname. My Step dad always wanted to be a Gramps.

  14. #14
    Registered User

    Nov 2008
    Melbourne
    2,008

    I think it's best to let them decide what they want to be know as. And FWIW I totally get that your Dad is already Pa, my families a bit like yours. My sister had a different father to me (he died when she was young) and her kids call my Dad Pa. Then we both have a step-father, who our kids call Grand-dad. My Dad's partner didn't want a grand parent name so she goes by her name. Our mum died when my sister was pregnant with her first and wanted to be known as Nona, so that's how we refer to her. DH's mum is Mimi, her husband is Opa. DH's dad is Grandpa and his wife is Grammie. You confused yet?

    I guess I'm just trying to make the point that there is no normal or traditional these days. Becoming a grandparent is a very special thing (whether it is through blood or love), I think it is only fair to let them as individuals decide how they want their grandchild to relate to them.

  15. #15
    Registered User

    Apr 2010
    1,118

    For a while there I had Oma and Opa (Oma died this year), Nanna and her longterm partner <firstname>, and my parents ended up Little Grandma and Grandpa without any planning. My partner's mother has picked her own title for herself and her husband, and his father hasn't picked one for him and his wife. We don't see them often enough for them to be called anything other than their firstnames, although I know their other grandchild uses their proper grandparent titles. We see grandma and grandpa quite a lot though - the DDs think Grandpa is the Best Thing In The Universe

    I don't know if DD#1 sees her grandmother on my ex's side, I certainly never hear about it. Last time I checked my ex was very much estranged from his mother and stepfather, which does increase the available pool of grandparent titles ...