Motherless Mothers

[Mad Scientist]

big hun.....that made me - over emotional mumma here

me too. I'm sorry Tuesday's child xxx

I often think about my mum giving me and my girls a hug, and then I wake up. It sucks not having mum around anymore xx

[Khaleesi]

TC

[Khaleesi]

I'm getting married next month, nothing big just a small quiet wedding with close family.
We planned on getting Married in Jan but we put it on hold after Mum died as i couldn't deal with it.

Now it's getting closer again i feel that emptiness again that she wont be there, We will have a candle for her but it's not the same.

[Tuesday's Child]

Cheshire. Special occasions are always tough.

[Mad Scientist]

I'm getting married next month, nothing big just a small quiet wedding with close family.
We planned on getting Married in Jan but we put it on hold after Mum died as i couldn't deal with it.

Now it's getting closer again i feel that emptiness again that she wont be there, We will have a candle for her but it's not the same.

No it's not the same. It's so sad and it really sucks. She is watching over you.....I know it doesn't help much, but she is xxx

[indie24]

Thanks girls. I am back out of anti social phase. Your kind words helped more than you will ever know

Cheshire as others have said important milestones or dates are hard.

[Khaleesi]

I know the wedding will be hard, but i think having Bambi will be even harder.
Knowing they'll never meet breaks my heart....

Thanks Ladies

[~Gee_Whizzy~]

I know the wedding will be hard, but i think having Bambi will be even harder.
Knowing they'll never meet breaks my heart....

Thanks Ladies

Big hun.....i know exactly how you feel

[Tuesday's Child]

I know the wedding will be hard, but i think having Bambi will be even harder.
Knowing they'll never meet breaks my heart....

Thanks Ladies

I feel exactly the same way.

[buffy1]

I know the wedding will be hard, but i think having Bambi will be even harder.
Knowing they'll never meet breaks my heart....

Thirded. Much love to you Cheshire, and to the other ladies.

[Tuesday's Child]

I don't know where else to put this.

We found out a few days ago that we're having a girl. Even though I've had strong boy vibes since getting pregnant, I've known that should we have a girl I want to name her after mum. DH doesn't want to do this. He won't come right out and say no as he admits he feels rude, but he doesn't even want to consider it. When we have discussed boy names, I sometimes mention that I think it'd be nice to name a son after my dad. DH doesn't like either of dad's names and they are kind of difficult to work with so I can accept that. Afterall DH never met my dad and, I guess technically, he never became a grandfather.

But Mum is a different story. She was a grandmother for 7 months. Even though DD1 will not remember her and DD2 will never meet her, it feels important that they have something from her. It feels right to name DD2 after her. I know it's probably not fair to DH but I can't help it, I already think of her as Susannah.

[~Gee_Whizzy~]

big hun....its a hard one. i never wanted to name either of my DD's after my mum, for two reasons, one was because i thought her name was too old fashioned and two because my sister used it as a middle name for her DD. Would your husband (and you) consider using it as a middle name instead? that way you still get to honour her memory, but you both get to like the first name, itms?

[Miss E]

what about the middle name? I've always planned that if we have a DD she will share mums middle name. In fairness to your DH I can see why he might be a bit apprehensive about the first name, but surely the middle name us a good compromise.

[Khaleesi]

TC we are having a girl also & i decided to name her after my Mum, thing is neither of us were keen on her name as it's an older style name.
So we decided to name her after her fav flower which was a Red Rose.
Could you guys do something similar?

[Lana]

I am a motherless mother too. A club I really wish I wasn't part of.

The naming thing is so difficult my DH wasn't keen on using family names either. In the end I found a variation of Mum's name to use as a middle name that both of us were happy with. I just looked up the meaning of Susannah and it is "Lily" according to a few sites. Could you use Lily as a 1st or 2nd name?

[Khaleesi]

Lana

I've been dreaming of my Mum a lot lately, I guess i've been thinking about her a lot more than i realize

[Tuesday's Child]

Lana and Cheshire

Thanks everyone for your input. It helped to get it out the other night rather than stewing over it. The thing is Mum never even liked her name (she was Susan but not even her mother dared call her that, she always went by Sue) and it only occurred to me a couple of months ago to use Susannah instead. It feels right for this bub though - as though she's picked her own name out. But the fact that I'm missing mum so much is probably clouding things a bit.

Lana thanks so much for looking up the meaning. Lily was on our list for DD1 so it may be a good compromise.

[Tuesday's Child]

Had a good chat with DH about it. Even if he liked the name Susannah, he wants our children to have their own names. Not names that could place expectations or be a basis for comparisons to other family members. It makes sense, but it still feels like the name is right for this girl. And it didn't stop him from thinking that we'd settled on the middle name being his grandmother's

Change of topic. It's mum's birthday next week and her best friend keeps asking what we're going to do for it. He just turned 60 and they used to celebrate their birthdays together. We didn't do anything last year because it was still too raw so I didn't think we'd do anything this year either. Any ideas?