Hi Jennifer,

You might want to check out this thread: How to say 'no' to people in the birth room

When DH and I were thinking about DS's birth, we decided that we did not want anybody but us present and that we did not want any visitors for the first 24 hours. In order to prevent unwanted visitors, either during labour (god forbid) or in those first 24 hours, we decided that we would not tell anyone except for my Mum, that I was in labour. I really wanted my Mum to know, and I knew that she would not come barrelling in, as she understood our wishes. We also explained our wishes to DH's family so that they knew that once they were told about the birth, that they couldn't just jump in the car and come in. We felt that it was better to prepare them for the fact that DS would be 2 days old before they saw him.

So, I go into labour, and DH rings Mum to tell her from the hospital, which is exactly what we had planned, and he then rang her when DS was born. At that point, we both decided that we would like both his parents and my Mum, to be able to see DS that day (my Dad died a few years ago), so DH rang my Mum and asked her to come in, and his parents. They didn't stay for a long time - but enough to see their grandson and to have a cuddle. So even though we had planned for those first 24 hours to be just ours - we ended up changing our minds, and I'm glad that DS's grandparents did get to see him on that first day of his life - it felt quite special and intimate and I was grateful for their support after a long labour resulting in an emergency c/s.

About the ultrasounds - I also wanted that to be just DH and I. We had numerous scans, and we always got pictures or the scan taped, so we could show the grandparents the u/s pictures or the video - we both felt that was more than sufficient. I think it's such an intimate and personal thing that it's understandable to want it to be just DH and yourself.

I know it's a hard one because you don't want to upset anybody, particularly when you know they are so incredibly excited about being a grandparent and want to support you and do as much for you as they can. But at the end of the day, it really is your decision as to what you do.

Sorry to have waffled on so much, I just thought that may help.......GOOD LUCK!