A question for those who are done having kids but didn't have as many as they planned

[toomanyshoes]

Thanks for answering ladies, I really appreciate it.

I feel like I have 100 reasons to have/want another baby and 100 reasons not to. I'm 29 in June and I know a lot of people would say that's young but I never saw myself having kids in my 30's and DH in 35 in May.

I don't think my sanity will last another 9-12 months of TTC but I know if I don't have another now it will never happen.

I have this overwhelming feeling I should be happy with what I have(which I am) and leave it at that.

Sorry for the rambling

[grub17]

hi toomany,
we have recently decided to stop baby making We had DS and DD within 18 months of one another (took bleeting 5 yrs to get DS and then bam! DD wasn't muckin' about!) so while I always wanted 4 kids and lots of love in my house, I have accepted DH's wise counsel that that is not our path in life.
Part of me still wishes for those extra babies. We have one egg left even. But I've come to peace with the fact that i hate being pregnant (love having babies tho) and my body hasn't been mine for 6 years of pregnancy, breastfeeding, drugs, operations, ivf etc
I'm going to be selfish and declare myself done. Can't keep giving to extra little people and to the ones we have already create.
throw on top of that a touch of PND following DDs arrival, prolapse and the fact my last baby was 10lb 3 born in 3 hrs with no tears (would i have a 15lb bub in 15 mins next time? lol)
so i'm sad but i'm realistic.
done. and in love with what i've got.
excited to the future.

[Freya]

Thanks for answering ladies, I really appreciate it.

I feel like I have 100 reasons to have/want another baby and 100 reasons not to. I'm 29 in June and I know a lot of people would say that's young but I never saw myself having kids in my 30's and DH in 35 in May.

I don't think my sanity will last another 9-12 months of TTC but I know if I don't have another now it will never happen.

I have this overwhelming feeling I should be happy with what I have(which I am) and leave it at that.

Sorry for the rambling

Im in a similar position TMS. At this rate to have another baby we'll be trying well into our 30's and in common sense land it seems redudant to grow the boys we have up and then start again. As well as the HUGE age gap. So Ive said if Im not pregnant by mid next year we are done, even if we still want if that makes sense? There comes a point where reason has to win out

I dont know how to reconcile being done when your not complete; I think its hard to do so when the decision is completely out of your hands. Your well within your rights to never be 100% ok with it. I know I never will if we dont have another baby.

[RhiChiChi]

Definately a tough decision but one that was taken out of our hands. I would have liked more children but we are very fortunate and blessed to be pg with a second after ttc over 3 years and various different AI. We have one embryo on ice but DH says he doesn't want another one :-( I always thought I'd be ok with two I kept telling myself that I just want another bubs but the prospect of a potential baby waiting for us (after this one is born) is on my mind. DH will be 41 this year with me turning 36. I just can't see another baby being fitted in - I've got 7 months for this one to come along then how long do I wait to consider (if DH will even agree) to seeing if our frostie will result in a baby? I am resigning myself that I will probably donate our frostie to someone.

((hugs))

[mrscricket]

We are done too. 3 kids is enough for us but I do feel a little robbed that I don't get to be pregnant again. My heart aches a little when I look at the girls baby stuff. I loved being pregnant with them, and would love to be again but it's possibly selfish because I think 4 kids would be a big strain on us, emotionally and financially.