Coping with the negativity

[miss.cinders]

Mazzy you are an amazing woman. No way could I bite my toungue like you did.

You're an amazing Mum who is so in tune with her babes.
Don't change the way you are EVER.

Maybe the tune will change in years to come... I know it did with my siblings

xxx

[widdly]

Maz - well done on showing them the baby carrier and standing up for yourself on the immunisation front

I think you rocka nd Im sure you kids do too, and that is all that matters x

[CinderToriella]

Maz i hear u and feel for u.

It is so hard dealing with and trying to cope with other ppls opinions being shoved in front of u all the time and its there way or the high way

I still dont know how to handle these situations myself so i cant advise u only say i understand the frustration and how uncomfotable it is

[Nettie]

They would completely choke if they knew how respected and revered you are on this forum! Kinda makes me laugh on the inside.

It's like someone telling Stephen Hawkings that the only reason he's in a wheelchair is because he's too dumb to walk Pffft! I just can't fathom someone telling YOU that you don't know about parenting.

Sheesh - I wish I had you on tap for advice and to learn from... they just don't know what they've got!

That force feed would have made me cry too... poor bubba.

And I think a lot of adults would learn a lot about life and what's important if they chucked away their PDA and/or phone for 5 minutes and played with the kids on the floor...

Right... off my soapbox now - and back over to you, Maz! sorry, kinda got carried away there...

[CrazyLady]

Maz, this thread must have got me fired up. I got one of the "you're making a rod for your own back" comments today because i seem to take the less "main stream" route. This lady's youngest child is 24 might I add. I gave her a piece of my mind and she retracted her statements and changed topic quick smart.

Needless to say I think she'll think twice next time she wants to comment

[maz]

thank you all..really I feel so lost atm with the lot of them

Little up date on my baby niece , the one that was force feed on the cold back verandah

Sunday night my Inlaw's called the doctor to come to their house as she wouldnt settle down and is now quiet sick if a bad cold I so wonder why.

It really does break my heart.....I wish I would have said please take her inside out of the cold...why didnt I do it

FIL rang us J man TUESDAY afternoon to see if we got home alright on sunday and to inform us on the above. Just another thing to upset us again.

CL - I need to learn from you hon...I really need to speak up more.

[widdly]

poor baby girl Its not your fault though Maz, I mean think about, they wouldn't have listened even if you did tell them to take her inside.

[[M]umma[M]ia]

Im sorry i have only just seen this thread

Im glad you spoke up abit on your weekend. They have NO right to judge u as a parent. I have seen you kids (the little 2 atleast) and they are the most gorgeous and relaxed children. Mia was drawn to them straight away (which i was suprised about as she doesnt do that alot to other ppl) which just shows how fantastic they are. Your a great mum and dont ever let people look down on you. I know its easy for me to say.. especially when i dont do it myself. My SIL is preg atm and I have to sit through comments of " The baby WILL feed every 4 hours and stop overnight feeds in the first week". Its heart renching to know that. I havent been able to get it out of my head. I wanted to cry for that poor baby and its not even born yet Same person that says " im not breastfeeding a baby every hour when i can formula feed every 4 hours" wtf... I dont even know what to say to that. I get shut down by DF's family all the time. " why r u doing that?" "why cant she have a tim tam?" "babies get cravings for KFC too" (yes they actually said this!) and when i tell them something about Mia i get the hesitant.. "ahhh ok" grrrrrr. I too need to learn to tell them where to go.

Ok.. so that kind of turned into a little vent for me... back to topic..

Your wonderful and your family is wonderful! Dont let them make u think otherwise. mwah xox

[beckoes]

without sounding too rude, they all sound a bit wierd to me, i can understand people having differences in parenting styles and i totally respect that, but i dont understand people who dont laugh and giggle and cuddle thier babies and kiddies. Im sure they would think my house was an insane asylum....im sure the people living next door do, we all run around the house screaming and giggling all the time!
And i NEVER understood the 'making a rod for your back' comments, raising happy, confident, self assured, loved children....um...wheres the rod!?
You did great, and well done for showing off your carrier got to have a sneeky laugh about that!
Surly they will one day look at you and your relationship with your children and be enviouse of the close bond and happy family you have and wonder if they missed out on something!? hugs to you

[Emma1979]

i haven't read all the responses so i am sorry if i am repeating something someone else has said, but could you just nip it in the bud by addressing it as soon as they say something about your parenting/kids/whatever.... you don't have to say it in a mean way, but more just along the lines of 'can we not make comment on the differences in how we parent our kids, obviously i do things that you wouldn't, and vice versa, but the beauty of it is we all get to do things that work best for our families, so lets leave it at that'
hmmmm that didn't come out right, but you get my drift.... also i wouldn't be able to resist saying some things that they do that YOU don't agree with, but only in response to them commenting on your parenting first though, just to illustrate that everyone does things differently.... if that makes sense... they might stop so freely giving their opinion if they also get your opinon back in response, all said with a confident smiling face.... they are clearly trying to make themselves feel better/superior by belittling the way you do things... obviously insecure or something. or pathetic.

good luck let us know how you go.

[thepixie]

They would completely choke if they knew how respected and revered you are on this forum!

:yeahthat:
Don't these people know who you ARE???? You're BB's resident rock-star mama!
hmmmm - Mel? Melly & Pixie bashing?

[Arimeh]

hmmmm - Mel? Melly & Pixie bashing?

Haha! Yeah why not - been a while between bashings...

[Mummato2]

Oh Maz

Although I couldn't call myself a truly gentle parent, I would NEVER judge anyone for their parenting choices. I definitely cringe when I visit a particular friend who allows her baby to "cry it out" and I have given her DVD's with alternatives that she may not know about - but never ever ever judge if that's how she feels she needs to parent. It isn't me up with her baby with supposed "sleep issues"

Anyway, my point is some people look at others in a judgmental way as though if things aren't done the way "they" would do it - it must be wrong......it's nuts!

I'll bet your kids are pretty laid back, chilled, well adjusted and know if they need something mum's onto it......be proud of your parenting and of your children and although it's easier said than done - try to ignore the negativity.

I coped the same sort of thing recently when I was showing my MIL our MCN's (newly converted and addicted).....the look said it all. Instead of getting cut about it, I just put them away and then moved onto the next thing - I had a HUGE whinge at DH once she'd left and he understood - but I'm not allowing anyone to make me feel bad about my choices.

xxx