To be honest, I don't think "luck" comes into it. I think it's fairly obvious when we're in a relationship whether our partner thinks that housework is a shared responsibility or "woman's work". It's natural that their general attitude to this will extend to childrearing too.

So, in a sense, I think that women who choose a partner who doesn't pull their weight kind of only have themselves to blame. I know that sounds harsh but we all choose who we want to be with and what's important.

My DH is pretty good. Not perfect but pretty good. Because that's the deal I made perfectly clear when we got together. I told him in no uncertain terms that I expected us to divide responsibilities regarding housework when we were both working full-time. And I told him not to EVER tell me that he did more than most men because I couldn't care less what "most men" do, I'm only interested in what he does.

And if he's not pulling his weight he gets an ear-bashing. Because I can't respect or let alone love a man who can't cook or clean or acts all helpless.

He does claim to "forget" when I've asked him not to leave stuff around which gets in my way - which is a bit more serious because I have a bad back and it HURTS to bend down and move his stuff out of the way so I can get to the pram. So yesterday morning at 6.30am while he was having a lie-in I "forgot" that walking around in stilletoes on our polished floorboards might be a tad annoying for him. Guess what, no stuff left around today.

I've adopted a policy of zero tolerance!