Babylove, I think you will find that Schmickers was being mildly sarcastic. He is very much a supporter of homebirths. And I'm sure he was patronising you.

Tegan, as you work through your doula course you will do a reflective practise. Perhaps you can use this to your advantage and work through the issues you still have with Lily's birth. Maybe this will provide you with some healing and also help you to decide once and for all if a homebirth is really what you want.

It is totally normal btw to feel apprehensive. I mean, no matter where we birth we have some sort of fear deep down inside. It's merely the fear of the unknown. Now, whether you birth in a hospital, at home, or on a plane no one can predict the outcome. However, that said, we all know that we are more likely to recieve more intervention in a hospital setting. Sure intervention does have it's place when required. But in most births it simply isn't neccessary.