Not a downer, The Mrs! That's what we're here for! Uterine rupture, from what I have read, is not as common as the doctors would have you believe. You are so close It's understandable that you would start to have some doubts, given the past experiences - now to have some power over them You are doing what you can and you are well-prepared. Put your fears where they belong - they are fears of something that hasn't happened, and your body and brain will react as if what is in your imagination is real (the brain has real trouble distinguishing between fears and real things in front of you to be scared of). Breathe in deep and long, and get some endorphins happening - keep adrenaline to a minimum and only let it out of its box when that baby is out xx
I was not being facetious when I said I was happy that a lot of you are 'luckier'! I don't do facetious (I did it once on BB, many years ago, and apologised for it very soon after for it never to be repeated - before most of your time!). I'm not advocating that everyone book in, in the least. I appreciate the reasons people give for it, including the reasons my homebirthing sisters in my own area give.
I didn't say anything about 'not valid', Beatrix - that's what you've added Nothing about 'offence', and quite frankly, nothing negative about hospital programs, despite how other people see them as too controlling. For the same reason I will continue to support hospital programs (you would find that I have never maligned them) is the same reason I'm fronting up and maintaining a relationship with my local hospital about my planned homebirth. You said it, Beatrix - you feel as if it's a competition about 'hurdles'. Where I am genuinely happy for people who have minimal hurdles - I had much less work to do for my first homebirth. I wish I had that again. You don't have to identify with people who pursue it a bit harder. You haven't had to defend your hospital program to me, and never will. I could see you arming your defences a few pages back but didn't think you saw anything as a competition until now.
HotI, similarly, you have been clear with your reasons, which will help anyone who comes in here to read about the decisions people make and why, even if they never take part in discussion. Like you, I urge people to ask THEMSELVES why they are doing things and to question everything. Earlier in the thread I had debated with myself about letting the doctors and hospital know what I was planning. Now I'm clear on why I would do that, so I explain myself.
I am mindful of the audience other than that directly taking part here, which is why I got to effort to position myself. You think other people don't lurk here? You bet they do
I also come from a background where in my last pregnancy there were the likes of the Joyous Birth people who would denigrate homebirthers who used midwives, as if they were 'selling' out and not trusting their bodies and were being 'compliant', good women by using someone medically-trained.
We all have our unique journeys to get where we are and to achieve what we plan for. I'm not asking to be allowed to compete (because anyone who actually knows me from my past username will know that couldn't be further from my agenda), just that those of us who are in hospital programs, booking in, seeing GPs etc are considered just as determined to trust that home is the best place to plan a birth as those who don't trust the medical fraternity for their own reasons (which are mostly outlined in this thread by those people).
Looking back on this page alone, Sepata, your comment was the least helpful post. Could you please elaborate your position? As I said, everyone's perspective is helpful when offered as more than a one-liner.
My belly buddies group has defected to FB, where I don't want to have a buddies discussion, and I have found BB not to be the place it was for me in my previous two pregnancies. I drew a lot of courage and camaraderie from BB in the past and, in sad realisation, I'm not getting that this time round. It's not anyone person's fault, it's just a reflection of the changes that were bound to happen here. A general dissatisfaction. I have a rather debilitating pregnancy condition that I posted about in the relevant section a little while ago and my post has remained the last. So, yes, feeling a little high and dry and sick of answering real life questions from strangers without the community here to take refuge in. I have large age gaps between children, so I don't take part in many of the baby discussions here on BB. I stopped BFing my DD back in August/September (she was nearly 4 - but not as old as my DS when he stopped), and even then it's a bit lonely in the 'BFing older children' thread when 'older children' are now described at 18 mo
I guess I'm just facing the fact that BB and me are drifting apart, after 8 years. It happens