Oh Tegam- I'm sorry you've been left feeling doubt in yourself.
TBH I'm not really surprised by her reply. I think overall she sounds really lovely and supportive but I think she would feel it important in a written, recorded conversation to remind you of the role of trained birth attendents and the responsibilities you take on board if you choose to birth without them.
She has said she could provide pre & postnatal care (just potentially not immediately post-natally) if you want so I'd personally still be interested in having her involved if you want... unless you found her antenatal appointments became fear-mongering sessions.
She doesn't seem to get what you're up against with the hospital system BUT they can't force an induction or hospital stay so as she says, you could use them for pre & post-natal care if you want and just plan to turn up in labour (should you make it there) and your birth should be quick so they shouldn't have time to intervene. Or you could still just plan not to turn up.
At the end of the day, choosing a freebirth is about taking full ownership and responsibility for the birth. No-one can give you permission or approval for that- that would be contradictory as giving approval holds a certain ownership IYKWIM and no-one can own this but you. And that's beautiful! I've only just started to come around to the power of that myself... I realised I was still placing ownership of this birth with my IMs but it's much more empowering to claim it for myself.
All the bestand keep chatting it out!
that everything is okay and you can go as long as possible.
) to feel out some prices/payment plans. So far our best bet is someone who can take payments via credit card, we'll borrow my mum's card and pay her back at our own pace. As much as their websites all say that they can work something out for people on tight budgets, not one of them seemed open to doing just that 
There's no way we can afford a HB, even if we cut back heaps of stuff. No time to save it up if we could anyway... Probably have to go back to the Northern for substandard care - it's some sort of care at least 
She'll be back in 9 days so no baby till after then. Gives us two more weekends to clean and prepare. Gosh HBs are much more work! With moving furniture, setting up birth pools, buying tap fittings, buying HB things like gloves and plastic sheets... there has been much more to do. We haven't done a single 'setting up the nursery' type thing this time though so saved our energy there I guess. My H got offered a job in Seattle so we'll be moving there in Feb next year which has killed the desire to even bother buying a cradle. Baby will spend time getting used to the kinderkot for day sleeps now instead 
Clever bubby, turning like that! I'm another really looking forward to seeing you get to 36 weeks (and beyond perhaps 
)
) i dont want anyone to stop trying for one. Its just that we all do as well as we can with what we have and whenever there is more that one person involved then you will have to compromise. I promise you you will have a lovely wonderful birth!
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