Stretch and sweep - please help me decide :(

[Shanti]

So, I'm 39+3wks pregnant with my 2nd. "Apparently" it's a BIG baby, they are thinking 9pds + and don't want me to go too far over dates..... I went to 41wks with DD until I went into spontaneous labour and she was born 8pds1 (3.66kg) so not real big just about average.

I do look massive with this bump and I had a dating scan 3 weeks ago which 'guessed' the baby is 3.5kg (+/-500g), mind you, dating scans are only a 'guess'.

I've been told I can birth at the birth centre where I'm booked in at if I don't go overdates, so I have until Friday basically to go into labour ....... otherwise, if I go over dates, and go past Friday, I will be having bub at another hospital nearby which is where I had DD anyway. It's not too bad, I mean I had a great birth with her, all natural etc but it's a busier hospital now and I just don't want to go there when I've been prepared this whole pg to birth at this birth centre/hospital..... it's alot quieter and post care is better here. I know that if I do give birth at the other hospital (my last one) I can get transferred to this hospital anyway to receive my post care, I just don't want to have to do that kwim??

So, today had my appt and my MW (who I see every time) offered me another chance for a stretch and sweep. I said no again. Same as last week. I just wasn't sure and still not sure...... should I or shouldn't I?? I've read about them, good and bad stuff, it's invasive, not very comfortable but would it work?? My cervix has to be ready right??

Help me decide what to do.... I hate feeling this way, feeling a bit rushed to go into labour by my due date otherwise I have to change where I am giving birth and that just plain sucks. I am against induction and will wait til 42weeks until they induce me.... even if they recommend it earlier, unless bub or I are in harms way (of course).....

They are concerned about my 'higher' chances of bub having shoulder dystocia because if its a big baby...... but I know that even women who have 6 or 8 pds babies still can get it..... doesn't have to be a big baby to get it right?
AND what IF, this baby isn't that big after all, and I go over dates, end up birthing at the other hospital and then it's only 8pds after all...... all these things going through my mind.....

I left my appointment in tears today (as we got to the lift) with DD saying "mummy its ok don't cry mummy" awww she was so worried about me..... DH was with me thankgoodness too!! I just feel so emotional about it all..... maybe that's the emotional release I need before I go into labour Maybe I'll cry again later this arvo..... LOL

It's not that I'm against stretch and sweeps, its more so, I just want to be left alone to let my body and baby do it's thing..... in its own time... ya know?? With no pressure..... whatever happened to just having a baby and letting nature do it's thing.
Anyway if I change my mind, I can have one tomorrow or weds or thursday my MW said...... so I dunno.

What would you do??

[Cassius2]

Can I ask why they will transfer you at 40w on the dot? it just seems a bit strange: even for finicky birth centre policy, could you ask them why baby needs to come before or on the EDD? I guess you have already asked them this, but going by your previous childs weight, I just wouldnt feel comfy in being transferred for possible big weight (FWIW i looked HUGE this time around and DD2 was only 7.5lbs....i put it down to my *awesomely* stretched stomach muscles

argh, i feel your frustration! so not fair!

[Shanti]

It's their policy apparently. They say that because of my 'tummy size' and how far along I'm measuring (measured 42wks last week at only 38 weeks). Not sure what I measured today, I didn't actually ask. Forgot. And I'm kinda over it.
They don't want 'high risk' babies birthed there, and apparently due to size, it becomes high risk..... because they can't do emergency CS at this hospital they aren't equipped for it...... hence why they want me at the other hospital if i go overdates..... I can understand that re: they don't do emerg cs's....

This is a very pro natural, anti drugs, pro vaginal birth centre/hospital I'm attending too.

My instincts tell me this baby isn't as big as they think it is anyway..... I just carry big.

[Ginger]

wow! you sound like you've got a lot on your mind. big hugs.
i can really relate to you. i completely did my head in just before the birth of my second ds. mainly due to worries about his size.
can i ask you- have you tried any acupuncture or anything?
was the sizing scan that you had indicating that the baby is larger than it should be at that stage?

[Heaven]

I can only tell you what I'd do

I wouldn't have anything invasive like a S&S before my due date. Probably not til I was 7-10 days over actually. I just think your baby will come when he/she is ready and trying to force it might make you have a harder labour. You will go into labour soon. If you go overdue I doubt it will be further than with your DD.

It sucks that you would have to go to another hospital if you're overdue, that's ridiculous to not even give you til 1 wk over before having to change.

Now go and have some sex! lol. Worked for me this time

[Shanti]

wow! you sound like you've got a lot on your mind. big hugs.
i can really relate to you. i completely did my head in just before the birth of my second ds. mainly due to worries about his size.
can i ask you- have you tried any acupuncture or anything?
was the sizing scan that you had indicating that the baby is larger than it should be at that stage?

I haven't tried acupuncture this time around just yet but I think I'll be ringing her today.

Yep, scan showed I was measuring 3 weeks ahead.... that the baby was about the size of a 38 weeker....(at 35.5wks)

Yep, I do have alot on my mind..... I just want labour to start TODAY then I don't have to worry anymore I feel so emotional and upset about it all....... tears starting

[Ginger]

hun i totally feel your pain. i was going through a very similar thing to you 2.5 years ago.
no one can tell you what to do obviously, but i can tell you what i ended up doing if it will help you?
i was very scared as my first ds was nearly 5kg and i looked even bigger with my second pg (and i weighed 4kgs more).

[Shanti]

Ginger - what did you do?

[Ginger]

ok well- i had a sizing scan at about 37 weeks in which they predicted he would be between 9 and 10lbs at 40 weeks. did my head in completely for the next 2 weeks (this was all around the time of black sat bushfires too so was a very stressful, emotional and hot time. had acupuncture, had stretch and sweep (did nothing). finally decided i would have the gel on the due date and then go home if nothing happened. had 2 x gel and he came the next day (vaginally but i did use pain relief drugs). he came out at 8lbs 3oz (a whole 2 pounds lighter than his older brother, even though i looked huge carrying him!). i was kinda spewing that i didn't let him come in his own time, or at least give him till 42 weeks like i did his brother, but in the end he came out safely and is a healthy happy cheeky little boy now. i was just glad i didn't have a c-section (because i was begging for one during the labour- mainly because i had convinced myself he was going to be 12 pounds!)

look i also wanted to say that i had ds1 vaginally (10lbs 3oz) and he didn't have shoulder dislocation or any problems - so it can be done. i'm only 165cms tall (cass can vouch for that!) so if i can do it, i reckon anyone can....and if your instincts are telling you the baby isn't big anyway...then....don't worry too much about it is what i'm saying i guess!

[Shanti]

Thanks Ginger. Yeah, it's not the size of bub I'm worried about..... I'm tall, at 175cm, all of us in our family and DH's are tall people and so is DD. I also have been told I've got wide birthing hips and pelvis LOL and pushed DD out no worries even though she got stuck and was posterior (hurt sooooo bad) but I did it!!!! no intervention at all.

I know I can do this, I just wish the hospital would believe in me

I am booked in for acupuncture weds afternoon - wish me luck...... earlier if she gets a cancellation.

[Ginger]

you can definitely do this hun.
just go with the flow a bit over the next few days. try to relax a bit (easy for me to say, i know!)
is it really that bad if you go over 40 weeks and end up in the hospital? doesn't sound that bad to me? idk?

[onthefly]

Trust your instincts. It's unlikely that your baby will be too big for you, and you have good reasons for not wanting to force labour early
I also wouldn't have an S&S till about 42 weeks - both my pregnancies have lasted 42+ weeks so a bit longer than yours.
Definitely let all that emotion out - face it honestly and examine your heart. How do you feel about this and your options. What feels right for you now (and what will you be happy to live with afterwards)?

[Ginger]

i would just accept the fact that you're most likely not going to end up having the baby at the birth centre. spend the next few days just trying to take it easy, relax and look forward to meeting your new little person! try not to stress too much and don't worry about making any other decisions until 41 weeks or so.....

[Jakabella]

Hugs Hun.
At 36 weeks I had a dating scan and bub measure 42 weeks! So they said bub was going to be huge and I could prob expect another c sect. I went into labour at 41+4 (dd was induced at 41+6) and H was 9p1oz so not that big really. I did have a S & s but didnt go into labour from it.
I did want to try though as I also had the pressure of if I went over 42 weeks that I would be booked in fir a c sect.
Go home and try some natural methods and try to relax.
You have done it once before you WILL do it again xo

[OceanPrincess]

Shanti... I had two s&s with my DS, one at 40 and one at 40+3. I was supposed to have a third at 40+6 but the MW I saw said that obviously the first two hadn't done anything so she refused to do another one. DS was born 9am spot on 41wks after going into labour at 3am.

Strangely enough she made me cry - sounds like our appts were similar - and that actually DID help trigger my labour, I fully believe.

I don't think it will do anything if you are not ready - you could always ask them not to bother if they find out that your cervix hasn't started softening?

Oh can I also add that he was almost 11lbs and no one ever said I looked big, I actually measured slightly behind, there was no concerns he'd be that big - it was a shock to everyone!

Trust your instincts hun - if you don't feel like bubs is that big, go with that - don't let them stress you out with talk of emergency c-secs and shoulder dystocia! My 11lbs boy just barreled on out with no dramas and also he did less damage to me than his 8lb sister!!!

Good luck sweets. I'm very excited for you. Go have some sex, shake your booty, go for a walk, cry more... The crying worked for me.

[Shanti]

Thanks everyone.

There is no way they can pressure me into doing anything I don't want to do. I'm a very strong woman!! LOL..... the only thing that I don't have control over, is where I birth and that is at the other hospital after Friday. If that's how it is, so be it. I had DD there and had a wonderful experience anyway so it's not a bad hospital at all. Just busy. I think I will need to start visualising myself giving birth there from now on, just to be prepared.....

Acupuncture, lots of sex and a curry is on the cards over the next few days and if that doesn't work, then it wasn't meant to happen just yet I'm totally all for letting bub come when ready. I would never be happy with myself if I rushed bub out.
As long as I don't feel comfortable having an S & S then I will keep refusing it.

I think some more crying might help too. Thanks Ocean Princess

[Ginger]

just wanted to check in and see how you are going Shanti?

[krystals]

Just wanted to let you know my experience- I had a S&S... 2 actually, and and I'm not sure they actually did anything. My first was at 39wks and DS came at 41+3, 2 days of labour after my second one. I can't be sure that it was the S&S that brought him on, or if it was just his time. I didn't find it that uncomfortable myself, although I know others have.

DS was large, but my difficulties in birthing him were due to his position, not his size. He had a few problems resulting from his birth but he's in the 2% or whatever statistic (I know that 79% of statistics are made up ) that was large, in a terrible position and who turned the wrong way and got stuck.

I've just read that and realised it might be frightening for someone about to go into labour, but I'm telling you that so you can have anothers person's perspective- which is- I don't know if S&S's actually 'do' anything except take up some time and give you something to focus on, and that the chance of shoulder dystocia relies on so much more than just being 'big'.

I'm very excited for you to meet your bubba!!!