Thankyou all for the support. I know no one can give me the "magic" answer.
For those who asked, I did initially talk with FS about continuing BFing but she was a no to it, although mostly for reason of unknown risk to DS (she doesn't know I tried this cycle whilst still feeding). She also, like many, does not "get" the incredible difficulty in actually weaning.Sushee, I did my own research into the risks of fertility meds to DS (there is even a very recent ABA talk on the subject) and felt very comfortable that the risks to him were very low, probably no more than if i was cycling naturally. Thankyou for your story -I sooo understand how you must feel. I am worried about regretting the choice to wean especially if I don't get pg but then I might also regret not trying sooner rather than later. I don't want to lose the opportunity to have another child if that is possible.Just wish I had the crystal ball!!
Michelle - so lovely to see you still in here. We have shared similar journeys and now look - our boys growing up to fast!! How are you leaning at the moment - wean or not?
I really hoped cutting right back on the feeding would do the trick but looks like I will be in the small % of women who need to wean completely for ovaries to work. Well, at least I hope they WILL respond if I wean.
Now I'm rambling, this is all so hard but I am glad i came back in here. Its nice to communicate with some women who understand. Most people would just tell me to wean and get over it!