Neesy,

Don't you dare do such a thing as suicide. It is even more gunah. Not just taking your own life but to take anothers too. It was meant to happen. There is a Turkish saying that "God had plans for it to arrive on this Earth and taste life". I had a miscarriage recently and i believe that God did not intend for my baby to make it into this world and to taste life. Allah has already sent an Angel to your little bub, you and that Angel need to take care of the life within you now.
Life is precious, when we think about death we all cringe and do not want to die. Don't do anything silly.
I am sure your parents will come to terms with the new 'granddaughter/son" in due time, what else can they do? I'm glad you returned home as you will be much safer there. You just need to accept that you have done something wrong but the consequences believe me is just beautiful when you hold your new bub once it arrives safely into this world (insallah). Your mum might be angry/cross at you but she is the one who will understand you and i'm sure her anger will subside soon.

Why don't you join the Belly - pregnancy buddies in this forum? They will offer you a lot of support there too. Pregnancy is a beautiful journey.

If you want, you can private message me anytime.

Take care.