IVF after ectopic pregnancy

[Possums]

Hi everyone, this is my first post here and I have been relieved to read other stories on here. Two weeks ago I had surgery to remove an ectopic pregnancy. It was large and I was lucky it hadn't burst. My right tube was removed also and my left tube is not in good shape...not entirely blocked, but fairly damaged. My doctor is therefore recommending we now go straight to IVF.
I am trying to be positive but am still really up and down emotionally. Before the pregnancy was diagnosed as ectopic i had weeks of bleeding where i might have been pregnant, then was diagnosed as having an incomplete miscarriage at 9 weeks...given a curette, then after that, they realised i was still pregnant and in pain and the ectopic diagnosis was made and i was straight into hospital. It was a rollercoaster ride emotionally and my husband has been supportive but i have still often felt so alone and isolated and sad sad sad. I returned to work this week after recovering from the surgery. It's getting a bit easier and we are now focussing on the future and excited to start IVF, but nervous too. I see an IVF Dr in newcastle in a few weeks, Dr Schumack. I turn 35 this year and am aware of my age. We don't have any kids yet.
I just find that this seems to be defining all other things in my life right now, and people can be insensitive too.
I'd love to hear from anyone who can relate or has any words of wisdom. Thanks.

[Janie71]

Hi Possums and welcome!

I have not had exactly the same experience as you, but am about to start on IVF due to Ovulation Induction (for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) not working over a 6 month period.

Firstly let me say my heartfelt sympathy for your loss and also the trauma that you have obviously been through. It is a tough time not only having lost your little angel, but now facing the prospect of IVF. You have come to the right place. Everyone here is so wonderfully supportive and you will find that the understanding that you get here, you just simply cannot find elsewhere.

I have always known that I would have trouble to conceive, but it doesn't take away from the shock that you actually have to do IVF. Just remember that this is going to give you your best chance of achieving your dreams of having a baby.

I wish you all the very best of luck

Janie xxx

[Possums]

Thanks so much for your kind words. It really is nice to connect with others in a similar position. Helps reduce that feeling of isolation. Good luck to you also.

[dusty]

Hi Possums
Welcome to BB! I am so sorry for what you have been going through lately. The loss of an angel is devastating and to have your fertility questioned on top of that grief adds to it all. It takes time to grieve and understand what it all means. Planning and looking at your options is a good way to think positively about the future so well done you!

I wanted to let you know a good news story. A good BB pal (36) is now over 20 weeks pg with her second IVF bub and she has no fallopian tubes due to 2 separate ectopics plus cervical cancer at a young age.

For me it took me a while after discovering I had severe damage due to endometriosis to finally decide to move to IVF. I needed to come at it in my own way and time, knowing all the issues but being honest with how I felt. So don't feel you have to make a decision straight away if you don't want to. It is good to talk about it with people, specialists etc learn more and decide your path in it all.

I wish you the best on your journey to have your own munchkin.

xx

[Missy]

Hello Possums

First off Id just like to say how sorry I am that you had a ectopic PG and lost your angle baby. I can say I know what your going through As it has happen to me too, X 2 in fact.

The lady that Dusty is talking about is me. Dusty Wusty.

To give you a quick run down, I had Cervical cancer when I was 17, Had it removed, hemriged one week later. All was well, then all of a sudden started getting bad pains, cramps, etc, had lap done and found I had endometriosis. From there had 2 more laps done, to remove it but it kept coming back. All up had about 5 laps done, then they did the running the dye through your tubes to see how they are, Well blocked. Told me I wouldnt be able to have kids naturally so went off the pill. 9 months later, I never got AF. Yes I was pg. ok, now we come to 2006/07/08. DD is 14. New life, new DH, brought house, fell pg, found out it was ectopic. Had left tube removed cried for days, almost ended our relationship, moved into house, got married, decided to do IVF. First time IVF, fell pg with DS now just over 2, had ET (embryo transfer) done, ended up being ectopic, right tube removed. Did one whole cycle, ended up with 5 eggs and no pg, then did one more cycle, let them go to blasties and only had 2, had them put back and now im 22 weeks pg with my DS who is being born 15th July. Liam Matthew will be his name.

So much for that being short. You should have seen the long verson...heheh.

Hun I beleive you have to be pos++, have faith and patients, and just believe it will happen. I was like now way but no matter what, I was having more children.

I wish you loads of luck and send lots of your way. Look forward to hearing the good news soon in the furture.

Take care

[Acacia]

Hi Possums,

Welcome to BB There are a lot of people who can offer support and understanding here, I found it a wonderful place when I was first feeling isolated and sensitive when I started IVF.

I'm very sorry for the trauma that you've been through. Not only have you lost a baby, but you've gone through a great deal physically where everything has been changed. It is so natural for you to grieve, and to feel lost and to feel unsure. I'm very glad to hear that you're excited about IVF, and looking forward to the future now, even though I'm sure everything that you've gone through is still affecting you - it's such a good, healing thing to be thinking forward.

Everything you've gone through is defining, firstly because it is a big deal to go through, and secondly because of how deeply it affects you. It's natural. And because you feel so affected by it inside, but still have to function on the outside in the real world, it's very easy to feel isolated and that people around you in your life cannot understand properly and thus cannot respond sensitively enough. That's also natural to feel that way. I can tell you I feel like that most days going through IVF, but I haven't even gone through the trauma you have gone through This is where the people here on BB are the most understanding. So many other women are going through circumstances with their fertility and can relate to the feeling of being isolated and misunderstood/not cared about in the right way.

So I'm really glad your here at BB, because you will receive support and understanding Please ask anything you may need to know about IVF - there will always be someone here who will answer any questions you have in no time!

Also, come and join the LTTTC & AC thread if you'd like here where there'll be heaps of other ladies (and a gent!) to chat to about AC and IVF.

I hope you're recovering well and that your journey have child in your arms is short and that all the trauma to achieve your dream can be over now.

Miss C