What's taboo?

[glenny_c]

It's strange, I think it has a lot to do with the audience, i.e who's saying it. There are some things that some of my friends say and joke about which I find funny in their company but would never share with others as I am aware of how it could be taken badly. I think I laugh with them because I know it is said innocently, these people would never knowingly hurt or insult someone and I know they don't mean anything maliciously. I guess that means I have double standards.

I think even in their company though, I would never joke about or accept jokes about child porn or paedophilia. That seems to be my limit. I have been guilty of sharing jokes about gay people (never saying being gay is bad, just laughing at stereotypes), bogans for sure, pretty much anything! I used to say that the only reason DD wasn't buried in the backyard is that she was so darn cute. (back when she had silent refux and screamed all day). Again though, I wouldn't have said something like that to a stranger in case it was taken out of context- not how I meant it.

I have no idea if any of that makes any sense whatsoever?

[Cranky Kitten]

I'm another that'll joke about anything and everything to a point, but never directed specifically at someone if that makes sense. It's more a way of challenging the stereotypes, by making fun of them and setting the stereotype up as something to be ridiculed as a way of saying c'mon, you don't really believe this crap do you?

I do have lines though. Direct personal insults aren't funny. Picking on people who can't defend themselves isn't funny. And if someone expresses distaste for anything, it's off-limits when they're around.

[Mak]

I avoid comments on race, religion, sexual preference and disability, any section of the community that is marginalised or a minority. It can be really hard to judge your audience both in person and online and I would hope that I come across as respectful of others. I think it can be easy to think things are *funny* if you are not on the receiving end of the joke. I sound a bit uptight and OTT but have had recent experience where family members have been really hurt by this.
Comments about people wondering 'How the poor people live' and that immigrants who do not speaking English should 'go back to where they came from' are two that have come up for us recently - both said in front of my kids who happen to have struggling European pensioners as grandparents. Not cool or in the least bit funny.
I think there is a big difference at poking fun at yourself and commenting on other people too BTW.

ETA - I try to remember that most people do the best they can with the tools they've got as well and that it is only lucky circumstances that put me in the lucky majority for the most part.
Similiarly I hate it when people get stroppy about grammar on FB. Not everyone has had the benefit of good education - I am not talking about text speak here just the odd error.

[Novella]

I try and avoid making jokes about race/religion however there arer times when I will laugh about very broad stereotype jokes if in the appropriate company. I dislike jokes amde about people wo cant protect themselves such as people with intellectual disability or mental health illness, child abuse. Amongst a small group of friends there are very few topics that are off limits but beyond that I try and censor what I say as you never really know what might be a trigger/sensitive topic for someone

Comments about boat people/immigrants are really getting my goat up at the moment as there seems to be a lot of anger/hate behind the jokes rather than good humour/ jest. Plus a lot of ignorance.

I dont use the c word can't stand it

As for taking the mickey out of yourself when you are part of a minority group, sometimes I find that really awkward. I find derogaroty comments offensive even when it is being used by some one of an ethnic minority for example n*gger. Thats and Im not saying its not ok to make fun of yourself, Im a blond and often make blond jokes/comment on how I have had a blond moment so I realise there is a double standard there.

I am also guilty of foot in mouth syndrome!

[Calluna]

It's strange, I think it has a lot to do with the audience, i.e who's saying it. There are some things that some of my friends say and joke about which I find funny in their company but would never share with others as I am aware of how it could be taken badly. I think I laugh with them because I know it is said innocently, these people would never knowingly hurt or insult someone and I know they don't mean anything maliciously. I guess that means I have double standards.

I think even in their company though, I would never joke about or accept jokes about child porn or paedophilia. That seems to be my limit. I have been guilty of sharing jokes about gay people (never saying being gay is bad, just laughing at stereotypes), bogans for sure, pretty much anything! I used to say that the only reason DD wasn't buried in the backyard is that she was so darn cute. (back when she had silent refux and screamed all day). Again though, I wouldn't have said something like that to a stranger in case it was taken out of context- not how I meant it.

I have no idea if any of that makes any sense whatsoever?

This is what I think too. It depends on who I'm with.

I will joke about most things, but not in a public place itms? At a mates place, when I know the people anything goes, but I wouldn't say the same thing on a bus our on BB (usually).

I don't use "gay" as a derogatory term, nor do I say retard, the c words. I'm sure there is more but that's all I can think of right now.

ETA- I also won't make jokes based on judgements of people, ie no "look how fat that person is hahaha". I really only find broader ones amusing, the ones based on stereotypes rather than a specific person. Am I making sense? Lol

[forshelby]

Sushee- I mean if I were to sit around studying this metaphorical 'rulebook of life' that would be a waste of life IYKWIM? I'm not sure I know what I mean, lol.

[STARRYSKY]

I get really annoyed, especially with teenagers of my extended family who constantly use the word "gay" or "faggot" etc.. I usually ask them inane questions about why that person is so happy, or why are they a bundle of sticks?
We have quite a few same sex coupled/ single friends, we've spoken about it a few times, they don't seem to mind at all, but I feel as someone else mentioned above that language can be very powerful. Even though it may seem such a "little" thing.

I won't generally be drawn into conversations in groups where race, religion or LGBT is being bashed. I have been known to either walk away or just stare at the person making such derrogatory jokes. LOL
I have plenty to say about such topics and discuss them with the appropriate people( not nasty things) . So I suppose it does to some extent depend on who I am talking to.

Mental illness is another bug bear of mine, we have quite a bit of it in both sides of my family and Dp's.

[MissEm]

I don't cuss, or name call. I'm respectful of people of all ages, races, genders, sexualities, abilities. I don't call people or things gay or retard or the likes (and plenty of people jump on me for it, being in my early 20s, it's apparently 'weird').
I don't joke about things that people would find offensive or hurtful. Rape, violence, abuse, miscarriage/loss/death etc etc.

ETA: I wouldn't call it taboo though, it's just not how I talk or express myself. I grew up surrounded by people who spoke in such a disrespectful way, I saw the hurt, and I even experienced the hurt it caused. I grew up believing that I would not be like that, and I stuck to it. I don't necessarily expect people to not swear around me, or share jokes, but if I don't like it, I will say so.

[briggsy's girl]

i'm another that depends on audience, and anything goes with some people, yet in general i'm very respecful of everyone

i don't like tend to indulge in "gay" jokes - but when it's with my TBG, who is openly gay, it happens - he feeds me jokes, i joke back. it's just the way it is. i've had gay friends call me their fag hag - it's just what it is. it's not offensive, it just IS, kwim?? TBG is also a (very) black Indian, and there are always black vs white jokes passing between us - but it's just because of who he is. i'm not a racist person, i don't see him as anything other than my friend - but the jokes still happen because that's the friendship we have. i may bag him out about his diet being nothing but curry and rice, but i'd never say anything like that to another Indian - nor do i even think like that - it's just said in fun kwim??

i think what is taboo is really dependent on the situation, so you have to be smart enough to read the situation and choose your comments.

having said that - Holocaust, 9/11, pedophilia - nope, not on

and i must say, i find the jokes going around within hours of a celebrity death to be in really bad taste. i received more than a couple of jokes about Whitney Houston, and i just kinda shrugged and wondered why people honestly found it funny, cos it's just not something i see as funny.

[Snowy Love]

Re: bogans. I think it's all about mindset, attitudes and values. I'm often guilty of dismissing people who don't agree with me as being bogan Something I need to work on.

I like to think I am not being PC but RC - respectfully correct.

It never occured to me that bogan would be offensive to a bogan, even though when I use it I mean it in a derogatory manner - I don't refer to people with a low income or who live in a particlular suburb as bogan, behaviour determines 'boganness' to me. I wouldn't refer to them as bogan to their faces, so I guess it is - if you can't say something to someones face it must be offensive.

I'm taking RC - might use it next time PIL go off about political correctness.

[sushee]

Hmm. Maybe some religious people would find your the use of "hell" offensive? I don't think some people take too kindly to elements of their religion being made fun of

Lol it's the religious that most likely will think I will go to hell. Especially since I used the word in actual context. I'm sure my mother does!

P.S And I'm Catholic! ROFL!

[Astrid]

As has already been said, for me it is mostly about audience and appropriateness.

DH and I can have our jokes. He will joke with his online boys about me "having his balls" if he does not get off soon, but in turn, I would not actually make that threat to him joking or not.

Funny, I am a bastard, but don't take offence to it, in fact it is a word I use a lot. I am a swearer though

I don't joke about animal cruelty. I love my animals and in saying that I am a meat eater who does "farm" animals for eating.

If anything though, I more upset about the setting of where something gets said, as opposed to what is said. How appropriate is it? Just because you think it and just because someone you know might find it funny, saying it in a Church, workplace, supermarket queue, on facebook, is sometimes just out of line.

[Calluna]

I've been thinking about this and I wanted to add, that intent is important too. If I know the person is racist, I'm not going to find thier jokes amusing. If I know the person is not a racist and there is no malice/ ill-intent behind it then I'm more likely to find it amusing.

[AnyDream]

I think there's some kind of ownership rule. So as a breast cancer survivor I'm entitled to make boobless jokes to whatever parties I think are sympathetic to my plight. Similarly my gay friend is happy to make funny with the "dyke" references.

But I still think there are subjects that are not and will never be funny. Genocide. Suicide. Terminal illness. Persecution of minority groups. Violent crime.

I swear a bit but never aimed at people. And usually more in my head than out loud. I'm perfectly ok with swears being used in music & literature, but only when they are not overused, there still needs to be some cleverness in there.

I loathe Strings of swears used as nouns adjectives and verbs, because that poor person is obviously experiencing a depth of feeling they don't have the tools to express. It's tragic. And not a fan of words spoken in hatred, no matter who the target is.

[Livinthedream]

I LMFAO at Chris Lilley. I think he is one of the most funny insightful people around.
And most of what he says, I would consider taboo if it was taken out of context.
So I guess it depends on the time/place.
I am another serious potty mouth, every single cuss word there is has been known to come out of my mouth. Its a bad habit and I need to stop, as my 3 year old has now started dropping F bombs

[nothing2lose]

I think there's room for irony when it comes to satire.

[Rouge]

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[nickle730]

I use the word "retarded". I am trying not to use it. I have several friends with special needs children and I imagine the word is offensive to them. Special needs is just another kind of normal to me, retarded is an adult who responds in a manner inappropriate to the situation. I have no excuse and I shouldn't try to make one... retarded is an offensive word.