Non-Drivers Cooee!!!!!! - Your Reasons And Will They Change?

[Indadhanu]

Had my learners since 2004. Huge driving phobia since my dad just put me in a car in the back paddock at 16, I'd never driven before, was by myself with my 3yo bro in the back for no real reason except it was a good place to keep him still apparently, and I had an accident, I was going through a gate and hit the fence post. The car was our ONLY car, and mum and dad scared blue murder at me for 1. wrecking the car (well, I broke the lights on one side and the bonnet buckled a little, and 2. that my bro was in the back.

Plus a few other experiences. I get my confidence back a little, and drive for a while, and then something happens, like at the end of '07 we were driving to Rocky and in was dusk, and a bunch of trucks with their bright headlights blinded me and I just flipped out, swerved off the road, almost flipped the car. I haven't really driven since, well i started to 2 months after Jazz was born, but that faded out.

I'd love to have my license, but even thinking about driving is making my heart race.

TBH, I actually feel really ashamed. My SIL and neice tease me that my neice, who is 16 got her learners in January, will get her license before me. And then my MIL does the whole "how are you going to feel if you need to go to the hospital and you can't and something happens to Jazz". It's horrible, and I feel so embarrassed and ashamed whenever the topic of driving comes up, because I WANT my license, and to be able to drive around without having to take public transport, and know in an emergency that I can get Jazz to the dr or hospital, but its just not that easy

[luna moth]

I've had my licence since I was 17. At home we always had cars, and I always drove everywhere. When I backpacked Europe, I managed 5 months without a car, and my eyes started to open. Not long after, I moved to inner city Melbourne, and was soon desperate to get rid of my car - hated the traffic, and the stress, and the loss of time that driving represented.
Never managed to get rid of it while living in Melbs, but consolidated hubby and I down to one very early on - before we even moved in together. He just used mine when he needed one.
Now we're in Brissy, where we really got into it. New city, new routine. We bough 3 tanks of fuel in our first 5 months here, and one of them was at Goondiwindi, on our way in! The car was only getting used on weekends for an occasional trip to see ym sis in Byron, or go to a restaurant out in the burbs, or to do the supermarket shopping, and it struck us as ridiculous to spend so much per year on something we used so little. Then I crashed the car, and our answer was there for us.

Now... I ride to work (catch the train on off days, like if I'm sick or injured) DH has a bike trailer which he loads up with groceries for shops. On the weekend he also loaded our barbecue onto it and took it down to a park with some friends. We hire a car if we want to go somewhere, like down to Brunswick Heads this weekend, or sometimes when family come to visit. If we buy furniture, we get it delivered.

We might change.... right now I wonder about late night meetings when I'm too fat to ride any more, although everything else is under control for now. Or when we do have littlies. But I'm pretty sure the car dealers will still be around.

[Astrid]

And then my MIL does the whole "how are you going to feel if you need to go to the hospital and you can't and something happens to Jazz".

That is what an ambulance is for. If it is real emergency, even if you drive and have a car, it is recommended to use an ambulance. If you do drive, then it is best to have someone else in the car to make sure the baby/child is ok. I only drive if it is one of those times that I would rather then checked out now, rather than waiting for the next day.

[Phteven]

^ What Astrid said. In an emergency it is better to let a professional drive. They can get there faster and when your child is in danger you're likely to be panicy and your driving ability will be reduced (even if you're a confident driver). If it's not an emergency you can catch a cab or wait for a lift.

Leash, you shouldn't feem ashamed. It sounds like you had a scary experience so it's not surprising that your confidence has taken a bash. You'll get there in the end, there is no point in rushing things and then having a panic attack behind the wheel. Your MIL should keep her stupid opinions to herself

[Astrid]

I will admit before I got back into driving the mere thought of it would have me in tears. If DH had a go at me about it I would become hysterical and hyperventilate. I understand his frustration at having to catch a taxi to the airport when we had a perfectly good car. He was silly though, the times he wanted me to drive where the scary times, he could have eased me into it rather than getting angry as to why I did not want to drive the Tulla in peak hour. His anger just made me worse.

[aussienic]

TBH, I actually feel really ashamed. My SIL and neice tease me that my neice, who is 16 got her learners in January, will get her license before me. And then my MIL does the whole "how are you going to feel if you need to go to the hospital and you can't and something happens to Jazz". It's horrible, and I feel so embarrassed and ashamed whenever the topic of driving comes up, because I WANT my license, and to be able to drive around without having to take public transport, and know in an emergency that I can get Jazz to the dr or hospital, but its just not that easy

I get so sick of my inlaws teasing me too.,. To be honest if my kids needed the hospital in that much of a hurry I would ring and ambulance. or ring DH to come home.. Even if I had my license I would do that..

People are so insensitive and they don't realise comments like this make our confidence in driving even lower..

My DH is great. He says I know you can drive it is only you who can go do the test.. then in a half smart way he will say the longer you don't have the license then the longer I can do all the driving lol..

[misty]

I don't have my car liscence and nor do I intend to get it anytime soon. Truth is, I just couldn't be bothered. And I am sooo sick of everyone telling me I should, how much easier things would be if I did, or how now I am having my 1st, 2nd and now 3rd kid I will HAVE to get a liscence because I will need it.

The thing is, I know how to drive - I just have no desire to do so. Yes it might make some things more convinient like when DH is out of town - but the truth is it isn't a big deal to me. I don't WANT to become reliant on driving everywhere. Also we are a one car household, so unless we bought another car I wouldn't have much chance to drive anyway. And if we did buy another car, that is just another unnessecary expense and I am scared of the fact that like most other people who drive, I WOULD become reliant on the car.