Bailey - the travel sounds like a downright pain in the butt! the physical side of IVF is hard enough as it is - the additional travel and KNOWING that your DH can't be home within a day if you need him... the lack of a settled "space" to call your own would be very frustrating and disruptive emotionally as well as physically. my DH can generally be home within 36 hours... i travel for treatment, but only a 200k round trip for each appointment, but even that is physically draining!

"if if doesn't work, he'll be spending years feeling guilty and disapponted"
wouldn't it be lovely if they realised that this is how we feel after EVERY failed cycle? we KNOW a fertilised and viable embryo has been put back, so when it fails, even though technically there is no blame for anyone - it is the worst feeling of guilt that your body didn't do what it needed to, to become pregnant! in this circumstance, given that the doctors don't think a reversal will work, i can understand your partners reluctance to have the surgery - but i can also understand why you're asking. it is something that only the two of you can decide and ultimately you have to weigh up whether it is worth putting yourselves through that "maybe, maybe not, just for a kinda maybe chance that we'll get pg on the off-cycle month"

just wanting to wish you all the best for your upcoming cycle - hoping this is the last one for a long long time!