Long Term TTC & Assisted Conception May 07 #3

[briggsy's girl]

and chez - when you start with it all - you'll usually find one of us online that can help if you need it!

[Chez67]

Thanks everyone for your replies and your support. I feel much more comfortable asking the "dumb" questions to you all than I do picking up the telephone, but now that I have spoken with the nurses they do seem very friendly and understanding. I am still trying to memorise all of the drug names and brand names that I have at home! I am going to ask for the letter anyway, that way I can be certain I am doing the right thing. And thanks for the advice about the treatment sheet - I am starting to feel like I need to get myself one of those PDAs so that I can cross reference my treatment schedule with my DP's travel and work schedule and all of the other things that we make commitments to each week! Still, it will all be worth it in the end.

Have a great day everyone and chat soon!

[briggsy's girl]

Chez - don't worry about asking questions hun! we've all been there done that - and wouldn't have gotten this far without everyone elses support!! and no question is "dumb" - so don't feel that way! - also, dont feel bad about asking your clinic any question - you're the one paying the bill...!

well, having a bad day again - was in a meeting with my surpervisor today and ended up getting offered a half day off to make up next week - must have looked pretty bad! having a quiet one this arvo then going to bro's place for dinner - he and SIL know what's going on, so i can curl up on the couch if i feel crummy, and no one will say boo - think i'll take my blankie and just relax - bro and DH get along so well that it's nice for them to get together - they'll spend the night in the shed watching footy, and SIL and i will kick back inside! at least we get a roast dinner - much better than the chuck together meal we would have done at home!

thinking i may have atouch of OHSS - but nothing as serious as BW - am just trying to ride it out for now... hve had a bit of weight fluctuation but nothing too drastic, and my tum isn't getting any bigger (well, not since i started measuring on tuesday - who knows how it compares to pre trigger shot - nurse never told me to measure back then!) - from what i can gather, apart from drinking lots of water and taking it easy, there's no spcific treatment - so i'm not going to stress too much - i just wish i could take something to settle my tummy down - i hate running back and forth to the loo all day! - but i'm trying to do the right thing by the bubba i'm hoping is taking hold in there...

[Ellie]

BG...sorry to hear you're having a rough day...sounds like tonight will be much better...hang in there...thinking of you and sending lots of sticky vibes your way xxx

[briggsy's girl]

Ellie - i feel kinda guilty whinging about how i'm feeling when there are others like yourself who've gone to hell and back lately! hope you're doing ok hun

[Ellie]

BG...don't be crazy!!! Everyone's 'bad days' may be different but they are still BAD...and with all the pressure this journey puts on us it can make a bad day...a really BAD day...if you get what I mean? I feel guilty because I'm doing so well today? I've realised that I've been grieving for a week or so already...first the denial...yesterday was the sobbing...last night was the angry...now acceptance of the fact there is absolutely nothing I could have done or can do...I just hope I don't sound heartless...we will have our baby...just not yet...but I know when it does happen the timing will be perfect...so please keep sharing...it's good to know others are dealing with the 'stuff' the universe keeps throwing at us...united we stand hey!!!!

[Lenny]

Hi all,
Ellie, you are an amazing person. I hope i can show and ounce of the strength you have over this journey.

BG - ekk - i hope you don't get any more OHSS syptoms and take care of yourself this weekend.

Well you can read on if you are bored - here goes my story...
FS says that there are 3 possible explanations for my hideous last cycle. 1 - it was a random blip (think BW's law of probability explanation to Mel). 2 - my body hates the drugs (think BG and the synarel problems). 3 - i have bad eggs.
So we are going to work through the options in that order. First i do another full Stim cycle with down reg, just like last time. If it was just a random unlucky cycle, then hopefully the next one goes better. If not, we move to option 2 in which case we try a flare cycle - nice and short, no pill, no synarel (like you Lou?). If this does not work, then we move to the dreaded option 3. Not sure whether i'll cope with the option of 'bad eggs'. Ahh well, one step at a time. I am considering myself very lucky that i am getting to move straight on to the down reg part of the cycle straight after the last stim cycle.
I asked FS about the ICSI possibly damaging the embryos, but is apparently not an issue anymore these days.
I asked also why i appear to be on a low dose of GonalF compared to others. He said this is because he would put a PCOS person on a higher dose as PCOS can negatively affect egg quality. Therefore if they use a higher dose, they get more eggs, and hopefully in the end the same number of good quality eggs. He said my age (even if i feel old!!), my previous history of response to Clomid and the last GonalF cycle, and the fact that my endo is almost all gone, should mean i have the same result from a lower dose than other's have with a higher dose. I hope that made sense. It has taught me not to compare myself with everyone else all the time!
He also told me if i want to i can use Lucrin instead of Synarel. I haven't decided yet. I know Synarel works (maybe too well!) but i hate the nasal spray. I'd rather inject myself, but I am scared to try something new, in case the cycle is a bust again, then i'll blame myself for messing with it.

Well, that was a long long story. I just needed to share with people that understand. It would sound like mumbo-jumbo to anyone else!!

Wishing everyone a great weekend.
Jo

[butterfly_warrior]

Jo, I'm glad the FS has made you feel better about things. I really, really hope you don't get to option number 3! When it comes to the choice of synarel and lucrin - I've done both and would pick the lucrin again every single time! Apart from the fact that one didn't work and the other did, I found lucrin gave me lots less side effects. Even when you take the sinus problems out of the equation, the headaches from synarel were just BAD, but the lucrin ones were a lot milder. It's also only a once a day thing, much easier to cope with. It is of course up to you, but if I were in that position and had to do the same thing again, I'd be trying to change what I could to see if that gave us a better outcome.

Me... just tired, cold... and haven't had a single anxious blip today at all! May have just been because it was a quieter day, may have been the fact that I now know what causes it. Still pretty stressed out with unpleasant work situations and seriously contemplating taking some time off from work around transfer... I'm sure I can talk my GP into giving me some time off work due to the stress I'm under there and the stress of the IVF cycle... What does everyone else think?

BW

[briggsy's girl]

Jo - i'm so glad you were able to get some options - and head into another cycle without a long wait! at least there is a solid plan in play - and that you only have to deal with either option one or two!

BW - glad you had a somewhat better day today and are coping with the anxity things now that you know what's causing them. i think you have a fair chance of getting a few days off work - just print some of your posts off here and i'm sure he'll see the stress your under!! enjoy your sleep in tomorrow morning - and rest up ready for the dreaded BT journey on sunday morning!

Ellie - thank you. i guess i hate it when i'm feeling mopey and there are other people in a worse situation - makes me feel like a sook! but i also know that every person is at a different point in their cycle - and what may be affecting me now can have the same impact as what another person is going through - that is physically worse - well, something that would seem a lot worse to the outside world anyway!!

well - dinner with Bro was nice, but i was so ready to come home early - i just can't seem to get comfy at the moment - if i'm sitting still then have to move, i feel all crampy and like i have to run off to the loo! ah well, such is life. Bro was making jokes about the whole IUI process with one of our friends that was also there - explaining in terms of farm animal AI - and as horrible as the analogy sounds - it was really funny conosidering we're country bumpkins that have spent a bit of time on farms and stuff! am loving being back at home now though, and relaxing on the couch....

[Loula]

Hi all,

Will be back later to catch up but have just got up out of bed, .....Ah to feel like 18 again and have a real sleep in. hehehehe but DH has gone to work and left me with no milk for breaky, and thinking toast would be an option no bread!!duf.

So im gonna take the dog for a walk while im at it and get a few thins down the street. just hoping it doesnt rain til i get back.lol

Jo just wanted to send you a reply
Do you have PCOS? sorry just typed out all my stimmed cycles and then re read your promis to yourself not to compair to others all the time.lol sorry but i hope you feel you can ask what ever you need.

I think they 'sould' be able to tell you if your eggs are a good/not so good quility at collection or fertlisation?

GL hun

BG - keeping everything crossed for you xxxxx

[briggsy's girl]

Lou - that's just wrong! how can your hubby leave you no milk??? hehehe

hope you enjoy your walk, hun, and don't get caught in the rain (we've got a glorious day today so i'm thinking i'm safe from the rain for a day or two!!)

[Loula]

Well being a tipical Londoner i took my jumper and jacket and then half way to the shops stripped off to my t!!!WTF with melbourne weather, neighbour said Oh it wont be looking like rain for a while,hahaha. Great so now i look like a real plonker walking a dog, carrying a jumper and a jacket fit for Everest .lol Txt dh and he phoned and couldnt stop laughing. ive been here 5 years and still cant get weather or traffic right (still on London time with traffic too and arrive 1hr + early ALL the b!@@$y time.lol

BW i forgot to add that Mac told me that there would be less of a change i could get OHSS with the antanagist protocol. did he not explaine that to you?


Sorry just googled the extra shots of HCG that you are having and realised that this is what can cause the OHSS!! how many of these are you having? wonder if i should have asked mac for some?
Oh didnt get any milk by the way so had breaky out.hehe

[briggsy's girl]

i was told there was a fairly high chance of developing OHSS cos i had to have high dose of puregon - and more so this time around cos of the fact that i've been on and off the meds a few times this year already. if i've got it, it's only mild and i just have to deal with it - i haven't had the stereotypical effects (thankfully) - just crampy and upset tum, feeling nauseous and queasy - but i'm sure i'll survive!

[Lenny]

Do you have PCOS? sorry just typed out all my stimmed cycles and then re read your promis to yourself not to compair to others all the time.lol sorry but i hope you feel you can ask what ever you need.

Funny you ask. I was told i had PCOS when i lived in Ireland and i went through a shocking phase in terms of cycles and health. I was very upset and although i wasn't TTC then, i felt there was an obstacle ahead for us. Well, thankfully I don't have PCOS. I do have endo through! But most of that is gone now.

I think they 'sould' be able to tell you if your eggs are a good/not so good quility at collection or fertlisation?

That's what i thought, but he said no. It took getting them fertilised and then watching them, in order to see if they are good or not. Well that's the impression he gave us. Maybe there is a way of checking their quality, but it might only be done if we got to stage 3. I don't know. There was a lot of info, and once again we walked out and thought of more questions while we were in the car!

BW - i think that asking for time off is not a bad idea. It's not that you necessarily will need it, but if you get a +++, then you'll never ever regret taking the time. - I will have a discussion with my ovely nurse about Lucrin. DH is keen on me not using Synarel. Apparently i complained a lot!!

What a glorious day it was in the city today. We wandered around like tourists and enjoyed a sunny winter's day. And no talk of IVF etc - we remembered what it was like to be 'normal' people!

[briggsy's girl]

yay on the nice day in the city Jo! i so miss feeling like a "normal" person sometimes!! this whole TTC journey can become overwhelming sometimes, can't it!

good luck getting answers to your questions hun - is horrible walking out and having that little chat where both you and DH go "now, what did that bit mean?"LOL

Lou - had my second (and thankfully last) pregnyl booster shot today - woo hoo!!! it was the first one to actually hurt with the stuff going in - which was really weird - i think with everything that is going on with my body at the moment, i probably just tensed up, but at least it's the last one!

well - only 6 more days til we do a HPT - left it up to DH to decide when we'd do a home test and he's decided day 14 sounds good! i have been struggling with the tww big time - all i want to do all the time is pee! if i move (even if it's just the angle i'm sitting at), i need to go AGAIN - and it's driving me insane - i've realised how deperately boring our bathroom is after all the time i've spent there lately!! oh well - i'm holding onto the hope that it is a really good sign - just gotta hope my bladder behaves tomorrow at work - there's only somany times you can toddle off to the loo during the day before people start to wonder....

hope everyone else has had a great weekend!

[butterfly_warrior]

I had blood test number two today. And I don't need to go back for another one until Tuesday. The closer I get to transfer the more scared I am. I've been worried all day that we may have missed ovulation when I was left for three days without a blood test, but a friend of mine just pointed out that the fact that I'm still anxious would mean we haven't missed it yet.

I'm feeling more and more convinced about taking time off... current plan is that as soon as I'm told a day for transfer, I'll make an appointment with my GP. I was talking with the nurse at the clinic today about everything going on at work - I might ask them if they can arrange a medical certificate for me.

BG, I hope the bathroom trips ease up soon! It sounds awful!

BW

[briggsy's girl]

hi BW - sounds as though you're on target for a similar O date to last cycle - which isn't a bad thing for you considering trying to time the end of the tww to coincide with school hols!

i'd be going to the GP for the time off - the clinic can only really give you time off based on what they are doing - and FET isn't a big deal in terms of time off - your GP will be able to see the bigger picture...

enjoy your relative sleep in tomorrow hun!

[butterfly_warrior]

*groan* You had to remind me! Just gotta remember - it's all for a good cause!

BW