Welcome to the Long Term TTC & Assisted Conception Thread!
Your Moderating/Admin team for this forum are as follows:
Sarah_H Admin SeaChange marcellus Lenny
To contact any of the above, please see this post.
If you have any issues/problems with this forum feel free to email any of the above moderators who will be happy to assist you. All emails will be treated confidentially.
Just a reminder to all: all LTers love seeing a fellow LTer achieve that longed-for BFP, and we all find hope in one of our own having success in this difficult journey. But please remember that there are those who cycled with you who may not have received good news at the end of their cycle. Please do not post baby/child/pg tickers or pg related signatures (eg blinking BFP icons) etc in this forum out of respect for them.
As it's easy to forget to remove your ticker, please be advised that we will remove it for you if it's posted in here.
I'm so sorry to hear that you are feeling blue and big hugs to you . Don't apologise at all for posting how you are feeling... you have every right to be upset. We are all here celebrate the good news and offer support to one another when the news is not so good . It is a daunting thought to think about the possibility of not having anything to transfer or freeze after coming so far. Try to keep positive and 2 x 7 cell embies is good.... there is still time for the others to catch up by Monday. I know it is easier said than done though.. I'll be 'ing that they all make the grade for you and that you will have a fantastic one to transfer and good ones to freeze as well. Thinking of you and hoping that it will be 3rd time lucky, lol.
Sorry no personals. Am feeling rather upset, have had a cry and just dont know what to do. I need to vent a little.
So,DH and I travelled bright and early this morning for my first US and 3rd BT. All was ok good with that, just had to wait for my "official" results phone call. Noted at the US that the follicles they did measure were quite small with the largest being approx 10mm .
Anyway, got the call from the nurse. She let me know that she had spoken with my FS who wants to push on with this cycle (gee sounds promising..... not). He has asked that I keep taking the 450IU of Puregon and the 10units Lucrin each day and I need to go back in on Tuesday for a BT but no US this time hmmmmm. Nurse also told me that my Estrogen levels had increased slightly (Tues was 143 and today it was at 360) but still down on where they would really like them to be at. Nurse also told me that my uterus lining is at 6mm so all good there and that I have 9 follies however all were smaller than 10mm She also said that she was waiting for FS to look at my FSH levels from the BT. Not sure what she meant by that but Im sure it didnt matter.
To say im disapointed with those results is an understatement. I have a feeling that were headed down the same path as cycle number 1 and that is cancellation due to poor performance. Im sorry If Im affending anyone but this just isnt fair. Why am I not responding to my Puregon shots. Thats one thing I just need to know is why? Is there something else medically wrong with me that we have missed and I need to have it looked into. Not to mention, If we were to stop IVF and try naturally, what complications would we have then??? I thought IVF was to help, not hinder. Its just not fair.
Havent mentioned to DH yet but am seriously thinking of cancelling and giving up (I know this is only number 2 but can you blame me when it all seems to be tracking in the exact same way. I have even gone for Accupuncture for this session and I am of the opinion at the moment that I dont think it did diddly squat for me). I dont know that I can keep going knowing the information I know from my failed first cycle and what it is im being told now. I feel like I already know where this is headed and Its just not fair at all.
Sorry for the very big me post. I just dont get it at all now. WHY body, Why are you doing this to me!!!!!
motherhoodhereIcome- ((hugs)) to you hun and vent away. I am sorry your feeling so bad about your results and understand perfectly where your coming from. Dont throw in the towel just yet ((hugs))
airline- your little embies are still going, try to keep positive about that sweetie ((hugs))
Coral- awesome news for you, I hope both stick, my FS refuses to transfer 2, I have asked a few times now
Meg- sounds like everything is going great for you too. Sending stickyvibes
sonyalouise- so sorry mate ((hugs))
Bonny- welcome aboard and GL
AFM- I had EPU this morning, was most unpleasent the aneathatist was horrible and I got THREE eggs, I am somewhat dissapointed with that, trying to stay positive, I know we only need one good little embie *sigh*
Hey Motherhood here i come. I just want to say that I feel for you and really hope you get some positive results soon. I'm only on my first IVF/ICSI cycle and am a slow responder. Started on 150UI Puregon. First scan only showed 1 or 2 follies in one ovary with the other ovary looking a bit dead (FS's words!). I was absolutely gutted. Dose increased to 250 UI. Fri's scan showed only 3 follies. Sigh. Dose now 450 UI. FS said with 3 follies we still have a "fighting chance", so we've decided to keep going. I get that the first cycle can be experimental, but can't help feeling anxious and disappointed all the same. It feels like I'm on this scary rollercoaster ride and I'm just hanging on. Have got another scan on Monday and am hoping we don't have to cancel this cycle. I know it's your second go, but please try not to lose heart. Hang in there, girlfriend. Have my fingers and toes crossed for you
Mitf - So glad you are coping better this time round in your 2WW...can't wait to hear your results!! GL
Coral73 - Yay!!!! 2 great embies on board!!! Bring on Nov 3rd....GL to you tooo hon!
Loops12 - So sorry to hear again of your financial status.....I really do hope that you get to sell your tractor AND calf feeding trailer and all your worries go away!!!
In the meantime I hope it happens naturally....or maybe try another IUI??? Whatever you do, i wish you the best of luck!!
Sonyalouise - sorry about the confirmed BFN...just remember, one, two or more of us get pregnent every month..next one could be you!! I certainly understand the emotional rollercoaster we're on, so take your time and relax yourself....wine, cheese etc.
Tracy - Hope EPU went well today!!! when is your ET?
Meg76 - You go girl....anyway you look at it, its still a good number. GL in your 2WW.
Bonny - I am sure you will find all the support you need right here...the ladies here are beautiful....also don't be too hard on yourself, you still have a while to go and by next week it will be a totally different story. GL
Airline - Don't worry tooo much ( easier said than done, i know ), as long as they're dividing into cells, they can still be viable pregnancies, with beautiful, healthy bubs...just try and relax until Monday and then let them get comfortable and stick....
Motherhood here i come - try and keep positive, have you spoken to a councillor?
I don't know what else to say, thinking of you!
TRACY - sorry to read about your 3 eggs...but on the other hand YOU HAVE 3 EGGS!! yaaaayyy!!!
AFM - waiting for the time to pass....come on NOVEMBER!!
I hope everyone is off enjoying their weekend rather than sitting here obsessing like I am...
For those who have been down this path before I have a question- I've had a bit of crampy-pain on and off since ET on Friday varying from a stitch-like pain similar to when you can feel yourself ovulating to vague period-type pain. Does anyone know if this is normal? I'll call the FS tomorrow morning but would love your input before then!
OMG..was in middle of typing war and peace to you all with individual persies...and pressed the wrong button..so much for bloody touch typing!!!
sorry have to go to bed so quick version
motherhood - i felt terrible having read my last post and then yours not long after. it's human nature for us to want to achieve the next goal each time, and geez we've all been biding our time...I so hope you and dh have a chat and come up with a mutual agreement about what's right for you both at this moment in time. hugs
tracy - i hope your embies continue to divide and conquer! good luck with ET, mine is monday...actually my least favourite part - it hurts me!!
sonya - glad your back on your feet again - our moods change in the blink of an eye don't they!!
coral - bless you! thank you for your post. I've not hung around here much this weekend, but reading your post helped me.
AFM - well I have to reiterate that this EPU was my worst. I've clearly been really lucky with the first two cos I've felt crap for 4 days. Today is the best I've felt and I just hope my body's happy to receive it's little treasure tomorrow at 2pm. (a moments silence will be appreciated) My stomach was tender, the bloating was awful, and last night at work I had to pull myself together in the toilet, cos I just wanted to take my clothes off, relieve my body of the constriction around the middle and cry..in that order. Clearly this may have alarmed people so I chose the option of biting my lip, applying my lip gloss and holding a folder over my engorged stomach region.
Surprisingly, DH and I have not obsessed today even though there's been no phone call to tell us the progress. I socialised with friends all afternoon, and I'm in a good place. I just hope all the differences in this cycle mean it'll be a different outcome.
To all of you out there...who sign on looking for hope, answers, good news and support thank you. You have all contributed to my state of mind today. May babydust be carried as wide and far amongst you as posssible. Night.
Sorry for the long post I have not been in for a while.... but am just dropping in to say hi really and seeing how you are all doing. There is certainly some up & down emotions going on - why am I not surprised!
Motherhood - I feel for you I find all this hard enough with just a sperm issue in our way but to have to try and get little emby's and then they still have so much to get through to make the cut - its even more daunting - so I can understand why the numbers are even more important to you than some of the rest of us. There isn't much I can say - but hang in there and I hope it happens soon for you - it's a bloody hard road to ride - we all know that. 9 follies is still a good number and hopefully a little more time and some more drugs they will kick some butt and get them going in a growth spurt!
Emerald - I hear you with what you are saying tho it's not to say this is not hard on the guy's too. I had a bit of a discussion with my DP in bed last night about this same thing.. in that he has not had to change anything he has done, tho I mentioned ages ago that maybe he could stop drinking all together. Hard thing now is that his task (on EPU day) is less than 3 months away for us and so is there any point in him stop drinking now when they say sperm is 3 months old at time of deposit? I'm lucky I have a supportive man by my side, but it's still seems unfair some times given it's all me that has to go through it all as well as make all the changes & sacrifice.
Tracy - sorry your EPU was not very nice. It's a tough thing to go through anyhow without having personality issues from the specialist who you have to deal with. Sorry you only got 3 but at least 2 have fert & as you say you only need 1. FX they grow well and you are able to transfer 1 or 2 whichever way you want to go
Meg - Glad your Et went well. I can't remember about cramping after my 2 ETs but hope you get a good explanation from the nurses when you call. Stay well & FX for your
Bonny - Welcome to BB! it is a great place for support & information. Hopefully you are not in this thread for long (if you know what I mean!!!)
Airline - GL for ET today I hope all your 6 have made it through but even if you lost a couple, 4 is still a good number. Hang in there and hopefully this ET is it and you don't have to worry about the others this time round anyhow. Rest well and take care of you!
Coral - glad to hear things are going well. I can't believe FS decided to transfer 2 for you and only 1st spoke about it when your legs are in the air! That's certainly being put on the spot. You too rest well and look after yourself in these next few crucial days & FX for a BFP for you. AFM - yeah we are on next cycle I have started pill popping. It's just weird as I never speak to FS it's always the nurse and although she is very informative it just feels so "up to us" about what to do next, which I know it should be but I guess I just want some firm guidance. She is lovely and says she can not see any reason why it won't happen for us and reminds me that even for a natural pregnancy it's only a 25% chance of a woman falling pg in a month. (Never knew it was so low) And that just because it has not happened for us does not mean there is something wrong or that it won't happen it's just the odds are low and so it may take a few goes. I just don't know how many goes I or the wallet can take.
Loops - its bloody hard isn't it when you have to consider the $$ side. As if the whole emotional side of it is not enough. I just can't believe how expensive this all is. GL with whatever you decide to do I agree do whatever causes the least stress and only you and DH can work out what is best for you both at any time. Still sending some selling vibes your way!!
Sonya - so sorry to hear about the neg result. It just sux bad. It's taken me a really long time to get over my last BFN and I still feel gutted about it. Tho I need to look forward to the next cycle & concentrate on good vibes. I hope you are coping OK. I think I would like to take a break too but the $$ side makes us want to fit one more stim in this year so we are only $1600 out of pocket instead of doing it first thing next year and being $2700 out of pocket (or something like that) until we reach the safety net again. Plus I just feel like this whole process is pushing out the date I get to actually have a baby, I know its not old or anything but this now means if we are pos this cycle I will be late 34 and then if we have to go again I'm going to be 35 before we could have our baby. It's just not what I had planned and meanwhile all our friends kids get older and ours will be younger growing up - you know how it is. It's just so much pressure in a way. Sorry, not sure if that is positive for you but I guess if you feel the same way you know you are not alone. GL with deciding and enjoy the wine & cheese till your next cycle!
AFM - am pill popping and started another down reg cycle. They will start me on 275 gonal (where I left of in the 1st stim cycle) so I am praying for a higher # of eggs this time - but not too high. I REALLY do not want to have to do another stim cycle again. Just the $ and the time. I think I could cope (well I guess I would have to) if we have to FET again but another stim cycle I think would really push my limit. And I know there are so many of you out there who have had to do many more than me and I guess honestly you find a way to deal with it, so sorry no offense to you as I take my hat off as it must be so emotionally draining. Anyway am waiting for my dates to be posted out so I have some idea of when things may happen.
To all I have missed and hope you are all doing well and are ready to face another week! Hope it brings some joy and good news to many of you.
Last edited by Nix76; October 26th, 2009 at 10:17 AM.
: Had to fix all the ? that appeared in my post doh!!
Thanks for the well wishes. Am keeping my head up and think I just need to accept it and go along for the ride no matter what the journey may be.
Just want to say though, wish we were only out of pocket the same as you. Us doing the whole shebang (IVF, ICSI and PGD), even with the Medicare threshold and refund, a whole cycle will cost us out of pocket $5000 to $6000. Oh to dream hey .
Have a good day eveyone and Ill be sure to update you tomorrow after my BT and results. FX hey!!!
That seems crazy amounts out of pocket motherhood.
I'm talking an IVF/ICSI cycle with MIVF is $5300 and as we had reached safety net we got back about $4300. Then on top of that we had the EPU which was about $800 but we have private health so they covered all but about $300. Then you have synarel $100, which was covered through private health. So not sure if I'm forgetting something but I thought we were abotu $1600 out of pocket for 1 down reg cycle with EPU and 1 x ET.
So even if you add on PGD (I don't knwo what that is and how much) I don't get why you would not get more back? Are you sure? You are saying $5k out of pocket - what are they charging for the IVF/ICSI cycle alone as a comparrison? What exactly does your $5k out of pocket include?
If we were out of pocket $5k for 1 cycle there is no way we could be going back for another.
I have ready it is more expensive in Sydney - but it should not differ that much and medicare should rebate the same across the country.
FS is happy with the results from todays BT as it shows im finally responding to the 450 Puregon YAY! Nurse told me that my estrogen level at todays BT was 1195. Previously at Sats BT it was 360 and before that it was at 143. Need to keep going with the 450 Puregon and then back in for a BT and US on Thurs morning. Let the nurse know too that I have been feeling a little achy and period pain type feeling the past couple days or so and hoped that it was a good thing. She confirmed that yeah, it is a good thing. With my estrogen levels, we now just need them to keep going up and up.
I cant describe how happy Im feeling now and I feel as if a weight has lifted off my shoulders however as I have just told DH, I cant let myself get too excited, need to calm down and see what happens and go with the flow.
Nurse also let me know that she discussed with the FS what steps we can take to get around the slow response. His response was that in possible future Stim cycles we would start with the Puregon first and then bring in the Lucrin. Obviously I dont need too much surpressing. Oh well we will see hey.
Am so happy now. Bring on Thurs and Body/uterus, you are to be on your best behaviour all the way right to the end with our BFP (Wishful thinking)
Motherhood here i come - great news1!! i'm so happy to see things turn around for you and by your tone i can tell its brought a huge smile and lots of relief to you.....
As for the Estrogen levels, i have no idea as i never get told figures, just whether the levels are good or bad. Hopefully with the signs of your estrogen levels you will have some fabulous results with your ultrasound. You are finally on your way and i am really really happy for you!!
Motherhood- I am so pleased to read your posts, sounds like everything is going great. As for the eastrogen levels Im not 100% sure, but mine were all around the 1100 mark
Mrs P- hello *waves* sorry your having to be back here & of course I mean that in a nice way, I hope this next cycle is kind to you ((hugs))
Tantee- good for you, for realising what is best for you ((hugs))
Loops- ((hugs)) to you my friend, it aint over til the fat lady sings and I hope she has lost her voice for the next 9 months at least
airline- would you believe I was laying in the clinic thinking about you today lol, so glad your ET was not so bad as the previous two and I hope this is it for you
AFM- ET today, one 3 day 7cells embie and they are going to freeze the other which was a 6 cell (well they said they were leaving it till lunchtime to see what it did, I havnt rung)
Been trying to rest all afternoon, Geez I truly hope this is the one, stick little embie stick
Mrsp - Welcome back, and like the other girls said "sorry it had to be under these circumstances". Hopefully this will work out with great results this time.
Tracy - GL in your 2WW!! great to hear your doing well. FX
Long-term TTC & Assisted Conception - Oct/Nov 2009
. Don't apologise at all for posting how you are feeling... you have every right to be upset. We are all here celebrate the good news and offer support to one another when the news is not so good 
. It is a daunting thought to think about the possibility of not having anything to transfer or freeze after coming so far. Try to keep positive and 2 x 7 cell embies is good.... there is still time for the others to catch up by Monday. I know it is easier said than done though.. I'll be 
'ing that they all make the grade for you and that you will have a fantastic one to transfer and good ones to freeze as well. Thinking of you and hoping that it will be 3rd time lucky, lol.
Update - Not feeling so positive!!
.
She also said that she was waiting for FS to look at my FSH levels from the BT. Not sure what she meant by that but Im sure it didnt matter.
I was absolutely gutted. Dose increased to 250 UI. Fri's scan showed only 3 follies. Sigh. Dose now 450 UI. FS said with 3 follies we still have a "fighting chance", so we've decided to keep going. I get that the first cycle can be experimental, but can't help feeling anxious and disappointed all the same. It feels like I'm on this scary rollercoaster ride and I'm just hanging on. Have got another scan on Monday and am hoping we don't have to cancel this cycle. I know it's your second go, but please try not to lose heart. Hang in there, girlfriend. Have my fingers and toes crossed for you 
I am sure you will find all the support you need right here...the ladies here are beautiful....also don't be too hard on yourself, you still have a while to go and by next week it will be a totally different story. GL
yaaaayyy!!!
) My stomach was tender, the bloating was awful, and last night at work I had to pull myself together in the toilet, cos I just wanted to take my clothes off, relieve my body of the constriction around the middle and cry..in that order. Clearly this may have alarmed people so I chose the option of biting my lip, applying my lip gloss and holding a folder over my engorged stomach region. 
and hope you are all doing well and are ready to face another week! Hope it brings some joy and good news to many of you.
.
Verdicts In!!!
Bookmarks