LT TTC & Assisted Conception Feb-Mar 2011

[*beannaithe*]

Blossom – wow, your post was just like you were reading directly from my mind, I am in the exact same mindset as you and have been feeling that way for the past few weeks now. Just can’t seem to snap out of it and it is a really, really huge thing to try and get your head around, that it may never happen. I’m sorry, but I reckon your specialist is a bit of an arse being so blunt about everything. Surely, it is a positive thing that, as you said, you have managed to get pg before and had some good embryos – if I was in your position, I’d definitely be giving it at least another shot with having the NK cells under control. Big big hugs to you hun, I totally am sympathising with you atm.

Williever – wow, how much of an awesome birthday pressie would that be!!!! Hoping it is a great omen for what is to come. As for your hair colour dilemma – my hairdresser has been through ivf herself, so constantly has coloured hair and has a beautiful little 18 month old as a result of treatment so all is not lost, perhaps?

N2L – hey chick, hope you are doing better. That first BFN, when you have pinned everything on, is such a blow. But pooh to the hpt, bring on the BT – loving your attitude!! Please can I have some of that??!!

Loops – woot to the eggie – glad you managed to get one in there and it wasn’t entirely about ttc

Elocin – welcome to our little group, FX it’s a short and sweet stay for you 

HI JBM, Kass, Tantee and everyone I have missed, I know that there are loads.
Been very much MIA. As I mentioned to Blossom, I have had a crap few weeks, to the point where I took a week’s stress leave from work. Firstly, I am really really pi$$ed at our clinic as when we got the official BFN from them, I asked to make a followup appointment, to which my nurse said that they would have a meeting about me first, then make one. This was three weeks ago and STILL no appointment. I will be ringing on Tuesday (public holiday here tomorrow) and putting on my cranky pants. I can’t move on from this cycle until we’ve had that followup because I am so concerned about what happens next. Nobody at my clinic knows what went wrong and if they don’t know what went wrong, how can they put a decent plan of attack in for next time? Which is June/July. It’s really got me thinking that we may never realise our dream. DH doesn’t even want to try again – I’ve convinced him to do one more but is that enough? I don’t know if I’m quite ready to give up and this has been the first time we haven’t been on entirely the same page throughout this whole process. We have already agreed we don’t want to go down the donor or adoption route as its just not for us.
A friend of mine is going to Repromed in Christchurch and was telling me about their success rates, supposedly some of the best in Australasia and am very tempted just to go there and get a second opinion. Though it will mean a 1000km round trip for us each time. Have any of you ladies changed clinics at any stage? I’ve got the guilts even thinking about it, but as this friend said, nice dr and nurses do not necessarily equal baby. Which is so true, but then there is this other voice in my head going on – in my job, I have to deal with my nurses on a fairly regular basis which I would feel really awkward about if we do change – aaaarrrrggghh so much to think about. I really don’t know if I’m coming or going right now which is why we REALLY need our followup appointment.